Anal Sex: What Does the Bible Say?

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The bible spells out many sins. God’s word tells us that adultery is a sin.It is even a commandment.

Leviticus 18:20 (King James Version)

20Moreover thou shalt not lie carnally with thy neighbour’s wife, to defile thyself with her.

Exodus 20 (King James Version)

1And God spake all these words, saying,

14Thou shalt not commit adultery.

His word also tells us fornication and bestiality are sins.

1 Corinthians 6:18 (King James Version)

18Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

1 Thessalonians 4:3 (King James Version)

3For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication:

1 Corinthians 7:2 (King James Version)

2Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

Leviticus 20:15-16 (King James Version)

15And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast.

16And if a woman approach unto any beast, and lie down thereto, thou shalt kill the woman, and the beast: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

The bible doesn’t, however, spell it out for anal sex. There are no specific verses that say that anal sex between a married couple is a sin. There are verses that deal with homosexuality, but not a married couple. I believe that if it were a sin, God would have included it in with the others He mentioned. But since the bible is silent on this issue, there is a debate among Christians regarding this.

This is something that you and your spouse will need to discuss and pray about. The Holy Spirit will convict you as to what is best for your marriage. If one of you has a history of deep porn use, where anal sex was depicted, then it’s possible that engaging in anal sex could become a slippery slope for you, and lead back into your old, sinful lifestyles. You’ll need to ask yourself: Will doing this cause me to lust for more or for others? Will it remind me of the pornography and cause me to revert back to that? While participating in anal sex may be okay for one couple, it may cause another couple to stumble.

Just because something is permissible, doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s beneficial to you. There are precautions and health concerns that you need to be aware of. Cleanliness is important, and so is being gentle and slow. I have heard a couple stories from women who say that they have become damaged from having anal sex, and now suffer from incontinence. I have heard more stories from women who say they have participated in anal sex with their husbands for years and have had no side effects at all from it.

Some couples may be interested in anal sex or anal play, but after weighing all the pros and cons, decide that it isn’t edifying for their marriage. I respect and understand this. I humbly ask for that same respect in the decisions that my husband and I have made. May God bless your marriage!

Related Article:  What About Sodomy?

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28 Comments

  1. Some advice, Spicegirls…
    We tried anal inadvertantly for the first time in our marriage and it was close to awesome BUT I froze up when I began to think…dang.
    The funny thing is we have been absolutely against any thought of anal sex before our steamy passion took us there this weekend.
    I was shafted during a teen sexual affair and hated anal sex with a particular passion, as it made me feel like a dog, truly.
    We both thought it was gross and were mutually agreed upon the subject. It freaked us out when we went there. It was potentially amazing for both of us but I worry about the health issues and perforation. He would NEVER hurt me so we would appreciate some info.
    My question is….should we use a condom,
    is lubing up more comfortable REALLY and which lube is best
    obviously pain is a no go so won’t even go there, red light for both of us
    I used vitamin E for minor discomfort for a day afterwards as there
    was a little bit of a burning sensation from being dry during our loving.

    For those of you who are disgusted by my questions, don’t even bother me with your comments. My husband and I are so devoted to each others’ sexual pleasure that there is no way we would do anything immoral towards each other or against what we see as fine with God. I am merely asking regarding health issues and what to be careful about. Thx

  2. First of all, please know that everyone’s questions and comments are safe from insulting comments from others. This is why we have comment moderation on. We want this to be a safe place for every wife who reads here. :)

    Regarding lube, while my husband and I don’t practice this, I have heard over and over and over from couple who do that lots of lube makes a huge difference and a lot of couples use coconut oil, which we have talked about on our blog before as a really good lube. Lots of lube and go slow are the two things I hear a lot.
    Regarding wearing a condom, some couples do and others don’t. You don’t need to, but if you would be more comfortable then go ahead and use one.

    Some of the other CN girls might be able to answer more from experience, but this is what I know from research and discussing this with others.

  3. Yes, lube is a must. We use Astroglide, but your choice of lube can come down to your body chemistry and what works best for you. It can hurt without it. Go slow! This is something relatively new in our marriage as well. If you feel safer with a condom then by all means use one. We don’t but that’s mostly because when it happens its in the passion of the moment. Also, we practice it mostly when I am having my period and am unable to have traditional sex.

  4. Thank u both.
    Reason I mentioned using a condom is because we get so wild, we like to go all over the place and I get vaginal infections pretty easily so don’t need bacteria from my hinder parts to cause a problem for me.
    Lube is one of my favorite things but going ‘slow’ is a bit of a problem…I get crazy witth multiple orgasms through my entire body so I am going to play it safe when I feel ‘wildcherryish’ as I am sure my husband will agree!
    My darling man cannot seem to get past the issue of blood being gross so we wait for the three/four days or so when I have my period.
    So wonderful to be able to ask and get a reply.

  5. Just be sure you never go from anal sex to vaginal sex without a thorough wash or you will very likely get an infection.

  6. A company called Pure Romance (you can find them online) sells a product, Pure Pleasure, that is great for water or anal play. It is silicone-based, so it keeps it’s lubricating properties longer and doesn’t absorb into your skin like natural-based products. Good for vaginal sex too, but it’s definitely not edible–hope this helps!

  7. Haha…my husband is the same way, about blood issues, lol. Isn’t it funny that they don’t mind anal play or sex, but will cringe at the thought of a little blood getting on them? Sheesh… :) :) We have just recently started incorporating anal play on a regular basis, but we have not had anal sex except for once sooo long ago. All I remember about that is it hurt a lot and we had to stop. And haven’t tried it since. Every once in a while I get the urge, but I’m just really afraid #1 of it hurting, and #2 of getting injured. So if anyone would like to revive this thread, has anyone personally been injured during anal sex, or have you heard of anyone being injured by it? That is my biggest concern. Because if it just hurts for a minute, we can stop, no big deal. I’m afraid of doing some kind of irreparable damage. I mean, what are the dangers??

  8. My husband and I (married 6 years) have just recently started anal sex and wow- it has really spiced up our sex lives! I was in the same situation as you, mdccc- we had tried it once a long time ago and it was enormously painful then and I was always scared to try it after that. However, knowing that it’s always been a sexual fantasy of my husband’s and wanting to get more adventurous in bed, we decided to try it again recently VERY carefully. We now love it and have found what works for us. Here are my tips:

    1) You must be very aroused! 2) Clean yourself as best you can beforehand and be sure to use lube 3) Have your husband start very, very slowly and carefully- you have to really try to relax and talk him through it as far as the pace, angle, etc 4) Using a vibrator at the same time can really help you relax and enjoy it more- also helps having the focus of the stimulation elsewhere anyway 5) As for positioning, we have found that it feels best for me to either be lying down on my back, or else on my stomach, but lying down nearly flat, with him lying down very close to flat on top of me (“doggy style” anal sex just plain hurts for me and so we never do it that way) 6) Once you’ve both found a comfortable way, it can be AWESOME, but just remember not to go too crazy b/c you can get hurt/sore a bit (especially if you’re new at it, or especially if you don’t have enough lube) 7) Be sure your husband cleans himself well afterwards 8) Finally, we save anal sex as a special thing we do here and there- just about once a month or so to spice things up and we do vaginal sex all the other times. You will probably find that you need at least a few days to a week or more anyway to heal up in case you’re a little sore afterwards.

    Good luck! :)

  9. I have been married for 7 years. During that time my husband and I have periodically tried anal sex, we both enjoy anal play, but actual penile penetration is extremely painful for me. He has pretty much given up on it because he does not want to hurt me. I really would like to be able to do this for my husband, so does anyone have a suggestion on a good position to start or how to get past the pain. By the way I just found this site today and I am so thankful to be able to ask this question in what seems to be a safe place.

  10. TS, read: Anal Sex: How To Get Started for tips and pointers on how to make it comfortable. But if it still remains painful for you, then you shouldn’t pursue this anymore, and your husband should understand.

  11. It’s impossibly painful for me, TS… so my hubby and I do rear entry vaginal instead. It’s tight for him, and it has the same “from behind” approach.

  12. hear ya, it shouldn’t hurt if done right. It should be very pleasurable to both parties. Just like when you lost your virinity, it likely hurt at first (hopefully your lover was considerate). The same can be true with anal. Just make sure that you and your husband know what you are doing and communicate, communicate, communicate! You seem the type to be willing to make sexual fantasies or dreams come true. A husband should be willing to do the same. Good luck but I’ll be if done properly, you’ll both be wanting more.

  13. Regarding possible injury, mdcccc, it is possible. I have a barber who is gay, and once he was away from work for a long time. I asked a co-worker where he was and she said he was in the hospital for a torn colon(!)

    Now when my barber returned to work I did not query him as to the specifics of how it happened, but my speculation is that it was caused by an inserted object such as a dildo, because I do not believe a penis could cause such damage.

    But just the same, I would advise that if there is excessive pain in some part of the rectum during anal intercourse, do not dismiss it. Your body is talking to you. Try a different angle, or do what it takes to get rid of the excessive pain. Just be careful.

  14. I have found that taking it really slow and using loads of lubrication works for us…In the beginning it really stung but as we got use to each other it started becoming easier in a sense…Just a word of caution if you haven’t practised it in a while you need to take it slow too…

  15. Hi hiswildcherry46,

    About your questions I have been totally turned off by anal sex but was curisous to see what it was like I tried it It was ok I think it could have been better so … I did research on it and medically wise you should use lube and NOT AN OIL BASED one because it can cause infection (only) an oil free grease less one.. and yes a condom because there are bacteria in the anus and it is just better and safer for you and your husband . Anyways thats what I read on a safe sex web site

  16. cassie,
    You are right about being careful which lube you use. However, as far as the oil based lubes, Extra virgin coconut oil (the non/virgin stuff is bleached and deodorized and sometimes hydrogenated) actually is incredibly good for you. It actually has anti-bacterial properties and heals yeast infections, UTIs etc. It’s actually used for those purposes. It’s pretty neat stuff, a few of the other nutritious facts about it include: (in case anyone’s interested)
    -can heal eczema
    -helps bruises heal quicker when applied to skin
    -great for your hair and skin(heals cracked, dry skin and some other yucky skin conditions)
    If taken internally:(yep you can eat it!)
    -increases your metabolism (can help with weight loss)
    -helps lower both high blood sugar and cholesterol
    -helps cure thyroid problems(hormone imbalances, etc)
    -improves your immune system(can help prevent viruses)
    -can prevent tumors and some types of cancer
    -helps improve your digestive system
    These are just a few things that it can do for you. I’m not selling the stuff or anything, I just think it’s pretty awesome and that everyone should have the opportunity to know about it!. :-)

  17. DH and I started out using an anal dilator set and very small vibrator designed for anal play. It really helped me loosen up and relax. Now I enjoy anal intercourse and it is much more comfortable than the hard plastic dilators. Just remember to use lots of lube, go slow and relax. Also it’s a good idea that you are not feeling so passionate that the experience cannot be controlled.

  18. my hubby and i tried it for the first time after 21 years of marriage last night! It was fabulous. We did lube and all very well, and i didn’t experience any pain. I thought it would be very painful but it was not. We don’t have a great sex life but this definitely spiced it up. He loved it as much as I did. We don’t do it laying down, doggy style worked best for us, but he like vaginal sex best doggy style too so it kind of makes sense.

  19. my husband and i have tried this several times and it feels nice, but the orgasms that i get are very weak and leave my feeling like it wasn’t worth it. does any one else have this problem?

  20. Yeah at times I get that felling like why did I even bother, but if you will try using a vibrator for your clitoris or just play with your clitoris you will find this makes it a whole lot better, and the orgasm you experience from doing this is very addicting, when me and my husband have sex, I don’t feel complete or finished at times unless I can experience that orgasm again.

  21. My husband and I tried it years ago. I was hurt and it was very painful. I was petrified to try again. But recently we have tried it again and we love it. My tips would be. You have to be very very aroused and relaxed. We tried a plug that slowly stretches you and lots of lube (ky satin – from walmart) If you get scared have him stop. I prefer he stays put while arousing me again. I still get nervous from time to time. If you are nervous your sphinctor (sp?) will tighten and it will become painful. Stay very slow at first than adjust to comfort. It seems to be easiest when lying flat on my stomach.

  22. Well, sometimes I still have reservations about engaging in anal sex with my husband, but, overall this has been wonderful to “spice” up our sex life. A few things I would recommend to those interested in trying..
    1) Don’t give up on it, take it slow, little at at time.
    2) use lots of lube
    3)women, lay down on your backs, husband sit up facing you. Husband stay still and let the wife do the movement…this way, we can control the angle and depth of insertion.
    4) and of course, clean up afterwards to prevent any infections!

  23. The trick with the first couple of times is getting some “reach around” assistance. If my husband is “helping” me out in the front, and entering gently, I pretty much don’t even notice the discomfort. You are only uncomfortable for a short while until you relax.

    Some of the best orgasms I’ve ever hard were from an anal + reach around assist combo.

  24. I enjoy anal sex, but but husband does not. He feels that he is “feeling gay” if he wants/enjoys having anal sex on a regular basis. Any ideas as to how to change his mind??

  25. Lube is a must, as for me and my husband, we love anal sex, I think it brought us closer together!! I don’t know how y’all feel about using ” toys” but it feels better when you have a bullet!!

  26. I’ve read that it can be a lot easier for the woman if she’s had an orgasm prior to anal sex. I don’t know if that does apply or not.

  27. I enjoy anal sex and play with my husband. I found that you can buy anal lube that has a numbing agent in it, to keep it from hurting. It does work and yet still lets it feel good it just helps with the initial pain. It doesn’t take much so. Hope this helps.

  28. It is nice to finally find a website where one can openly discuss such topics with other Christian women. Prior to giving my life to Christ and marrying my husband, I frequently engaged in anal sex with a long term boyfriend. Back then I really enjoyed it and experienced multiple orgasms that included female ejaculation.

    However, I cannot get around the verse in Romans 1:26 about women abandoning the natural way for ways that are unnatural. I know a lot of people say that this verse is referring to lesbianism, but a lot of people seem to think it has to do with heterosexual anal sex.

    My husband has expressed a desire to engage in this activity, and I would have no problem with it (seeing as I previously enjoyed it) other than the fact that I am seriously paranoid that to do so would be an “unnatural act” and thus considered a sin. So, is this a valid concern or am I just being morally uptight?

    Help!


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