I got a comment on my recent blog entry about “Can our sex life send us to hell?” and I wanted to address the answer to this in a blog. A young newlywed asked me why we didn’t believe that anal sex is a sinful behavior.
A: The Bible is silent on anal sex. Of course it tells us that homosexuality is a sin and that bestiality is a sin, but it really says nothing about this type of sexual experience between a man and his wife. Since the Bible doesn’t give us a “Thou shalt not participate in anal sex with your spouse” commandment, we take it as to mean that God wants us to use our own judgment on it. In some marriages, there will be a spouse that wants to dapple in it, or try it out. There also may be a spouse that thinks that anal sex should never happen. The biggest thing to remember is that you and your spouse need to be unified in your decisions as a married couple…Personally, I feel that as long as this remains between you, your spouse and God, that your marriage bed will remain undefiled in the eyes of God.
Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” I believe that anal sex between you and your spouse falls within the bounds of this verse.
There are two different articles on our blog that I want to refer you to. One was written by my sister in Christ, Cumingirl who wrote Anal Sex: What Does the Bible Say and also another perspective from my sister in Christ, Cinnamonsticks, who wrote Anal Sex: Weighing Your Options. I think the main thing I would recommend to you is to discuss it with your husband. Find out why he feels the way he does, and you present why you feel the way you do. If there is still a disagreement on it, I would table the discussion and the thought of anal sex for a period of time. Pray about it, both of you, and see where God leads you on this. If you should both choose to try anal sex together, I feel that you may do so without worry about sin. God would have told us it was a sin in the Bible if he didn’t want a married heterosexual couple to engage in this act. If you both feel that God has given you the approval to do so, and you are both comfortable with anal sex, then go for it!
Thanks for your question!
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