Q&A: Adult Nursing

“I haven’t read anything about lactation erotica.  My hubby is interested in trying it.  I’m not pregnant yet but he said he wanted to test the waters, so to speak, with me to find out if I was okay with it.  I’m not sure what I think.  My hubby is definitely a boob man so maybe it’s no surprise that he’d bring this up.  I just hadn’t thought about it.  I figured once a baby came that “the girls” would be on active duty for the baby and hubby would have to do without.  I guess I’m wrong on this!  Now I’m wondering what it would feel like to give him my milk.  What if he likes it?  What if he likes it a lot (he thinks he will)?  We both know that the baby will come first but it is different to think about.  How do I wean a baby off the breast and keep it for my husband?  Any thoughts would be helpful.  My gut feeling is that if we start with this that it won’t be a temporary thing and that he would want to keep it going as long as possible.  Please tell me I’m not the only one to have to think about this!!!”

No, you are not the only one to think about this. Adult nursing is something that many couples think about and/or try. Once a baby comes, I think it’s perfectly normal for a man to be curious about breast milk. (Especially if he is a ‘boob man’ :razz: ) I have heard of Christian couples who practice this and say that it brings them a great deal of satisfaction. They view it as a type of nurturing between them, and say it adds to their intimacy.

While some of us may think this is odd, I certainly can’t find where the bible speaks against this. I do see where breasts are mentioned to give nutrition to infants, and I also see where breasts are mentioned as sexual organs between a husband and a wife in the Song of Solomon. I also found this scripture:

Proverbs 5:18-20 (New Living Translation)

18 Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
19 She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts satisfy you always.
May you always be captivated by her love.

It would seem to me, that God is saying that it is okay for a husband and his wife to enjoy her breasts in all their glory. I don’t see any rules or commandments limiting breast play.

There are also some marriages that continue with the adult nursing, even after the baby has been weaned. Just know that this does take work. The breasts need to be suckled several times a day in order to keep lactating. This can be difficult to do with most couples’ schedules. Pumping may help some, but you may become tiresome of the whole thing. It takes a great deal of commitment to continue nursing after the baby has stopped.

As I write this article, I’m reminded of a friend of mine who was nursing her one year old. Her husband complained one morning that they were out of milk for his cereal. She told him to feel free to defrost some of her breast milk and use it! He started acting like he was gagging and such, and they both laughed. He did end up trying it later, out of curiosity, but found he didn’t like it.

Like many other things, this does have the potential to become a fetish, so I would caution you to just be aware of that. Other than that, this seems to be something that you, as a couple, will just need to decide on together. If any of our readers have any experience with this, maybe they will leave a comment or advice for you.

For additional information and support on ANR (Adult Nursing Relationship) check out:  Woman-essence.

51 Comments

  1. A friend of ours, her BIL has his wife put her milk in his coffee if she is nursing a baby! I think it’s cute! DH used to be a little freaked by my breastmik but his only hang up now is that he likes to joke that he has seen what is does to our kids and he can’t afford to put weight on!

  2. My husband enjoyed tasting my breastmilk a couple of times, but he was much more anxious for my breasts to return to normal.

    For me, my breasts were very sensitive (and not in a good way) while pregnant and breastfeeding and he did not get as much “hands on” time as he would have liked. Also, when I became very aroused, my breasts would begin to leak breastmilk! So for sex while I was still breastfeeding, I always had to wear a bra or plan on having a towel under me or something.

    Another thing to consider is that if you have a considersable hormone change with pregnancy. That will not go back to normal until you are done breastfeeding. It will diminish as you dminish feedings, but for me things did not return to normal until about 4-5 months after I completely quit breastfeeding. Of course, that is different with everybody.

    Our conclusion: it is fun to have rock hard, huge breasts for a while, but it is even better being back to normal.

  3. When I was nursing our first child, we found out by accident that my husband quite enjoyed my breast milk! The baby was with my parents, and it had been a few hours since I had nursed and my breasts were pretty full. I actually let down while having an orgasm. I was so embarressed as I had totally hosed him down! He, on the other hand thought it was “the coolest thing ever!” (He said it was very sweet, and I actually tried some once and it was very sweet- I couldn’t drink it though- wrong texture I guess!) So, whenever I was nursing, we looked at it as an added bonus that he enjoyed my breastmilk. I was no longer embarressed once I knew he was okay with it, and I actually enjoyed giving him my milk. It was an intensley personal and nurturing and intimate experience for both of us. However, we both knew it would only last until the baby was weened- he never expected me to keep a milk supply and I had no desire to! When I weened the kids, I was ready to have my own body back!!!

  4. When we had our first child and I was nursing my husband would “help me out” when I was engorged in the middle of the night. He is a bit of a boob man and from that time on enjoyed drinking a bit during loving making while nursing. Sometimes he would have to because when I got aroused I would squirt all over him!! It was something we enjoyed but once I was done nursing my last child it was over and he just went back to sucking on them, even though they weren’t fruitful. I was a season, one I am sure he remembers fondly, but now we can focus on other exciting things. I did think it was a bit weird at first but it seemed normal and fun after a while.

  5. My DH has always liked my breasts too. He’s been REALLY fond of them each of the eight (so far) times I’ve had babies that I nursed. Since I’ve nursed well into each pregnancy, I haven’t had much time without milk in the last 16yrs!
    I will say it’s wonderful that he can help when I’m engorged!

  6. The spraying stories are ones I totally can identify with! While my husband does not enjoy my milk, and does not drink my milk on purpose, I have noticed that he is really careful about not making me feel bad or like he is avoiding my nipples. If I have recently nursed, there is not much milk in my breasts, and he can suck away. If I am closer to being engorged, my [breasts] get licked, nibbled, then teased and pinched by his fingers, and I get hickeys on other parts of my breasts and body. :-)

    We did talk about the whole issue before my first pregnancy. I must say open, honest communication is such a help. My husband is so sweet, and really has encouraged me in my journey with breastfeeding.

    I had one sad story about milk–my twins were preemies, and I overheard an unmarried couple in the pumping stall next to me in the lactation lounge. She teased him about drinking it, and he said “I would not drink that cr*p.”

    Whether or not an adult likes the taste/texture of something God designed to nourish little ones is not the issue–the issue is to continue to grow together in intimacy. Your breasts (and other areas of your body/emotions) will change lots over the next two years. Enjoy the journey, and don’t be discouraged when things change. If you don’t enjoy something one month, maybe the next month (or next year) it will be fun again.

  7. Some months after my DW had our first baby, I was enjoying her breasts and more or less by happenstance got some milk in my mouth. It was odd at first but I soon came to enjoy it. Our current baby doesn’t nurse as much now that she is not exclusively breast fed, so DW has less milk. To have her hold my head and take her mothers milk, I just feel so loved and nurtured. When she is aroused, she leaks and I find it thrilling. Sometimes her nipples are sore, then I just leave them alone. To have her in the Cowgirl position when she is full and leaking, it’s just wonderful. When the cold and flu season hits, I joke that I’ll need to be nursing more to take advantage of the anti-bodies available, one of the big benefits the babies get. Some day our baby will wean, when she is ready. Then I won’t be able to enjoy her milk. I just make sure to enjoy it while I can. It may not be for everyone, but we both enjoy it.

  8. OK, I have waited long enough. I’ve avoided posting a comment on the subject of ANR due to the fact that it seems like the only couples who have participated or dabbled in it had recently had a baby. Well, I am here to tell you that at nearly 50 years of age my husband and I have never felt closer…the bond of physical, emotional, and spiritual intimacy that we share due to our ANR is INDESCRIBABLE. While lovemaking one day, DH was suckling at my breast and said how he would love to drink my milk…I asked him if he was serious and he said of course and our ANR was born. We had NEVER heard of anyone ever doing this and had never read about it. Neither one of us had ever even heard of the term “Adult Nursing Relationship”. We are nearly one month into our newly found intimate journey and it is about as far from being a fetish as I can imagine! The Bible is very clear about a man enjoying his wife’s breasts…there are verses in Isaiah and Solomon. God obviously designed breasts for more than just feeding infants. I really think that it was so common place back then that it didn’t even need to be discussed or contemplated.
    Hubby says my milk is cool (that surprised me) and very, very sweet! He can’t imagine any man living without it and praises me continually for this unselfish act of love the I have bestowed on him. How ironic, I can only thank him for his love and determination to bring my milk in. When DH suckles, we are in this incredible dreamland that is so euphoric, intimate, spiritual…it often leads to sex and you cannot imagine how much more intense the orgasms are for both of us! For those who are interested and don’t want to be exposed to porn while you research…check out Christian ANR a yahoo group, also http://hismilkmaid.com, and http://milkmaidens.yuku.com/directory. The first site is open only to Christian married couples and is the most active (imagine that), the later two are geared primarily to women, but occasionally men will post but always in good taste. I have found nothing offensive at these sites. I love this site…it has set me free to be whatever God designed me to be for my husband. With so many of us willing to try out the use of toys and methods not always seen as “normal” please don’t overlook this God-given and natural means of pleasure for both husbands and wives; believe me, it is nothing like nursing a baby! And for goodness sakes…it’s free!

  9. ANR was beautiful until I became pregnant with twins. Cannot even find a comfortable way for my husband to nurse with my big belly. Also the nursing bras I wear don’t allow him to latch on the way he needs to for my milk to let down during the day. At night if we lie on our sides I can guide my whole nipple into his mouth. But it’s not nearly enough. I have a toddler home during the day. Anyone else pregnant with twins and in an ANR?

  10. And he does enjoy the spraying–just not the taste. :-)

  11. I guess I have to say no to both counts–and my twins are 14 months old (and happily nursing away). But I just wanted to encourage you in your journey. :-)

    I am wondering if you can try lying on your side, with him lying on his, but with both of you pointed opposite directions–like a 69 position, just not so low.

    Enjoy this now–I had so many restrictions from premature labor. I don’t know how far along you are, and I really can’t blame the prematurity issues on the fact that it was twins–I had prematurity issues with my previous pregnancy too!

    Enjoy the ride! Your life will be so different with three little ones!

  12. I agree with Tiger Girl. Creative positioning will help out with nursing your DH as well as sex. Pregnancy presents some unusual and often funny experiences. Go with the flow and most of all have fun!

  13. Thanks for listening. I’ve entered my 9th month and the doctor has told us to stop so we don’t bring on an early labor. Once my milk comes in we’ll go back to what my husband loves best only without the huge baby bump in the middle. Tanks

  14. I think it is GREAT that you could talk to you doctor about your special relationship with your husband!

    God bless your up coming birth!

  15. Thanks for your good advice. I should be in labor any day now with our twins and I’m happy to report we found a way to continue our ANR and then some. We discovered that our shower works as a perfect place to nurse if my husband sits in the shower chair and I stand and lean in. I can also guide my breasts to him so he can really latch on and I feel that let down of milk which I love. We have also found a way to make love so he can hold onto and support my belly so I don’t feel the weight of the babies. (they’re each a whopping 7 pounds) I’m ignoring all nursing restrictions. I’m beyond HUGE and the sooner I give birth the better at this point.
    I think my husband is amazed by my size. Wondering what I will look like when my new milk comes in. LOL

  16. Anita brand nursing bras are really nice. Don’t know what size you are, but I got up to an H cup. It is expensive and hard to find nice bras–not to mention nursing bras–that actually fit when you get this big! I am thankful for online options! As with your previous pregnancy, expect your cup size to change. A lot.

    I was annoyed that a relatively new (not even nine months!) bra was not supporting me as nicely, and it was expensive, and did not look terribly stretched out. I measured myself again, and had gone down two whole inches in cup size AND BAND SIZE. I bought the bra when the boys were nursing just about full-time (one bottle a day) and were almost six months old. By the time they were a year old, and fully lactating, my body had changed that much more! The band size was what really surprised me. I am curious now about what my band size was when the boys were first born, compared to now.

    You have some incredible engineering in your body, for your internal organs to be gently moved aside, and your rib cage to expand to hold in your two precious babies, then for all of it to come back down, and close up again. Our Creator-God is so Awesome! Truly, we are fearfully and wonderfully made!

  17. Thanks for your “support” SInce this is my fourth pregnancy I found a woman who actually makes custom nursing bras for various stages. I’m usually a double E when my milk comes in but she thinks I will be much bigger with twins. I’m also still nursing my 2 year old who is reluctantly weaning so I have been pretty swollen my whole pregnancy. I did get the nursing pillow though so I can tandem nurse. Any other suggestions appreciated. This is my first twin pregnancy and I am so much bigger everywhere.

  18. I was surpirsed by how much my husband likes my breasts and more surprised that he enjoys my milk. I always thought it was for babys but he says its good for US and I do feel closer now. We nurse everymorning when there is plenty for both. I know he wants to continue after I wean bubs but not sure how I’ll cope. The word says my body belongs to him but I need space sometimes. At the moment its helpful to me that he can ease the pressure when I’m over full and I enjoy the closeness.

  19. Often times women with young children can become what I call, “Touched out”. Our bodies are in such high demand when we nurse a baby off and on all day and then our husband comes home and also wants a piece of us…at least that’s the way I felt. After a full day of nursing/touching, all I was ready for was a hot bath and go to bed. Those early years are very demanding. It is very important to communicate with your husband when you need some time without touching and that this is not a personal issue with him; a time to regroup and see his touching in a different light.

    It’s amazing what a short break away from taking care of the kids and household chores can do…coffee with a girlfriend or just doing something just for yourself (Mother’s-Day-Out through a church, a class or bible study). If you are home full-time, a nap during the day may help you feel more rested for the coming evening. Taking good care of ourselves physically helps our attitudes and mental frame of mind; women are more desirous to enter into intimacy with their husbands when they take time out and take good care of themselves. I know that I do!

  20. Thanks for your help. My darling identical twin boys finally arrived and everything is hectic but wonderful. I had no idea my breasts would be this swollen and engorged with milk and I am very lucky to have a husband whose eyes pop out of his head when I free my breast from my industrial nursing bra. To be very frank when he latches on as much as it hurts, I can feel strong contractions in my uterus that I need to breathe through. I still look 5 months pregnant but I know my belly will go down. Doctor says we can start making love again in 3 weeks but I am being very careful. Last time we weren’t and that’s how why I have a one year old baby and twins. Can’t believe I am the mother of three boys. Will go for a fourth and hope for a daughter but we’ll wait a year at least. Good luck with your twins a well.

  21. Thanks for all your help. I finally delivered my identical twin boys on Feb 5th in 22 hours with no narcotics. My milk came in on time and as you predicted I am overflowing. Have been using the nursing bra you suggested which seems to be the only one big enough for me. I like that the big flap makes it easier for my babies to latch. Thanks Again. My husband takes the last nursing session before we go to bed and his suckling relieves my painful heaviness so I can sleep a few hours.He nurses to help me, but I can see on his face he is enjoying the fullness of my breasts and my abundant milk flow. I still look 5 months pregnant, but as I nurse I feel my uterus contracting- some of the contractions are so strong I have to breathe through them. Our doctor says we can begin making love again in three weeks. We will see if we will be blessed with a 4th. And many more.

  22. Many people have found that it doesn’t have to stop when the kids are weaned. Some may need to nurse 3 times a day to keep the milk flow up but others only need to suckle once or twice to keep it up. The main thing is that it is for pleasure rather than milk.
    There is a support group, yahoo group, “christian adult nursing relationship” for info and chat.
    Enjoy!

  23. how did you get your milk to come in without being pregnant? i’ve always been intrigued by the idea of anr but my kids are older and it’s been years since i nursed.

  24. Inducing and production of milk can be accomplished simply by maintaining a regular schedule of stimulation of the breasts…primarily the nipples and aereola. There are a lot of good videos on-line that demonstrate in a healthy way (showing clothed women) the proper technique of breast massage. Other videos targeted toward breast-feeding moms show women learning how to massage the breast and express milk. I recommend you check out the ones that are done by lactation consultants…I found a great one through a hospital doctor. These are all good exercises in the preparation of the breasts and ultimately stimulation of the breasts to produce milk. Many women have done this without ever having had children. The reason is that nipple/aereola stimulation, when done on a regular daily schedule, stimulates the release of hormones in the brain which tell the breasts to begin preparation to make milk. It took us a little less than a month to produce milk last September. My story is listed on the Woman-essence blog….as Luvmyhub. We nursed an average of every 5 hrs. around the clock; It happened very quickly! Nursing even 2-3x a day maintained my milk. But the key is to nurse at the same time every day with the same intervals between. If you can only nurse 2x a day…just make sure the sessions are 12 hrs. apart….3x a day, 8 hrs. apart. If you are able to add a session or two on the weekends, just make sure you keep your regular weekly schedule as well. Research has shown that nursing 20 mins on each side is sufficient. Fifteen mins. on each side worked for us. Sometimes…OK well often, we went longer ’cause the nursing leads into fabulous lovemaking and it’s ALL GOOD! Everyone is different and it happens sooner or takes longer for some.
    When a woman delivers a baby, the huge drop in her hormone level tells the brain to tell the breasts to start making milk…and it happens very quickly…4-8 days after delivery. But the breasts have been preparing by the growth of alveoli during the pregnancy. When you or your hubby stimulate the breasts you are in essence tricking the brain…telling it to start making the building blocks inside the breasts that will eventually produce milk. Patience is key!
    I was almost 50 and hadn’t nursed a baby in 19 years. Many women have induced never having been pregnant and were wanting to nurse an adopted child and/or have a bosom relationship with their husbands.
    Inducing lactation by stimulation of the breast alone does take longer but is probable. The methods preferred are listed in order: suckling by your hubby, then hand stimulation and last by breast pump. Once you are making milk, it is very important to empty the breasts and is accomplished in the same order of preference as listed above.
    I have just shared with you the technical aspects…it really is the emotional and psychological aspects of being near your husband that you will enjoy most. Milk or no milk, bosoming ones husband is a very intimate, private and indescribable experience. It is totally different from nursing a child…I nursed three children many years ago. Bosoming your loved one is on a whole different level as it should be.
    A final thought: If you do try to go for the milk…just take it as it comes and let it happen naturally. One can get over anxious, impatient and even worry over not lactating as soon as one desires. It really is more about the relationship and a loving healthy dependence on one another…another great way of loving your spouse!
    Blessings to you and your hubby…enjoy the journey…whatever it may bring.

  25. congratulations on your twins! Baby boys are the sweetest things :) when your supply starts to get regulated, you might see about getting some bras from Lane Bryant/cacique (i’m a 34 band size and their 36 fits me…) there’s one type that is stretchy that works to nurse in if you pull it down. I have found that when I’m heavy with milk, a nursing bra just doesn’t do the job well enough :)

    of course, my bras weren’t high quality but still I told my mom maybe I need a better nursing bra, and she said she’s tried several types and now just uses regular bras that she can pull down.
    again, congratulations on your babies :)

  26. Thanks. I’ll take a look at that catalogue. I’m also nursing our toddler (2 yrs) who has yet to wean, so half the time I don’t have the luxury of getting my nursing bra on- at least in the early morning. I have also found that since his brothers have arrived he’s nursing more than usual. Would love to lose my pregnant tummy to make it easier to tandem nurse- I’m still really sticking out there, but hopefully my body will settle down soon. LOL. It’s all wonderful.

  27. Hello hannahs,
    Congratulations. My “magnificent seven” were nursed until they weaned, naturally. Some weaned by 2 whilst a few of them were 3 or so. I tandem nursed a few which created close bonds between them. I did not suffer through sibling rivalry. They all felt wanted and loved even though there was a new baby every few years.
    I enjoy seven of the most special relationships with my brood ages 24 to 6.

    An important addition to your discussion….NUTRITION. Take care to eat quality food, and often. Nursing three children is a tremendous output and with your man taking a suckle, extra-ordinary.

    Drink all day long…teas, herbal teas, diluted low acid fruit juices, flavored waters, iced water, you name it. (Milk made my babies fussy so heads up on that one.) Keep your liver and kidneys happy by giving them plenty of fluid to flush them out plus assist your body in making quality milk.

    Watch your iron count. I lost hair twice during my child-bearing years. I have low blood pressure and tend to be aneamic therefore I was robbing my body of iron as I formed babies and then breastfed them. The finest iron supplement I have used, is made by Floridex. My iron count goes up within a few short weeks whereas regular iron tablets do nothing for me.

    Have a wonderful time enjoying this special phase in your life. Believe me, with all the strain and pressure, and wondering through the years if I would survive it all !!! ; being a mom of many children truly ROCKS.

  28. Thanks for the good advice. Am trying to stay hydrated and keep up with the nursing. The floridex is also a very good idea. This week I tried tandem nursing my toddler with one of the babies and I think he bonded with him nicely. He was less interested in feeding than exploring the head of his baby brother. Frankly I am so full I am glad my two year old is still interested in my num-nums as he calls them. I only have my husband at night and at this stage I am still engorged. He has been wonderful making sure I’m comfortable before going to sleep. And our own nursing keeps us so close. I don’t know how you nursed seven babies and lactated all these years. My hat is off to you. I’m looking forward to hearing number four is on the way, but I hope I have a while before I’m blessed again.

  29. Dear hannahs,
    Congratulations on the birth of your twin boys…blessings to you and your wonderful family. This is such a joyous time. It won’t be long and that the belly will be gone and you’ll forget you ever had one. Chasing crawlers and toddlers has a way of doing that! LOL!
    Enjoy this time…it flies by much too fast!
    Best to you and yours,
    Luvmyhub

  30. Really great advice. I would just add a few things…Power Naps! Sleep when ever those babes do. The laundry and the housework will always be there. Take care to prioritize carefully. Hire a teen from church to come help clean those bathrooms and vacuum once a week or every other week…she can even throw a load of towels in the wash while there (those are so heavy to transfer to the dryer). Proper nutrition, rest and exercise (go walk with the stroller when the weather is nice) will go a long way for your mental and physical health!
    Luvmyhub

  31. Hi hannahs,
    You made me smile.

    To not only survive, but thrive, during my childbearing years, I developed a deep knowledge of how beneficial breastfeeding is. Nursing my infants until they weaned and then nurturing them as they grew up, became part of who I am.

    My life became taylored to best meeting my babies’ needs;
    from feeding myself well so that I could feed them;
    to encouraging myself by reading about motherhood;
    to getting my attitude corrected so I did not copy the wrong mindset of my mom !! and so on.
    My entire married life has been strictly focused upon my calling, as a mother, before my Lord, Jesus Christ.

    Oneday, an adjustment period will come upon you as you let go of the mantle of infant bearing and nurturing. It is a bitter sweet time but one which can be filled with great satisfaction. Knowing that you did the best job you knew to do and were totally dedicated to your own, will allow you to literally sleep the peace of the beloved.

    Mothers are vitally important to everyone. I champion my cause with great passion because I can now preach what I have practiced. Aaaaaahhhhh, sound of my happy mommy heart ;-)

  32. Well I will await that feeling of Aaaaaaaah while I nurse my brand new twin boys. I do feel so blessed that my breasts are so filled with milk and nourishment. One of my best friends who birthed a daughter at the exact same time I birthed our twins is having such trouble producing enough milk. I was so grateful I was able to nurse her beautiful baby girl for over an hour yestarday and give her my sustenance. You are right and I completely understand how you felt that your babies were your mission. We are now in such a rhythm with our tandem nursing almost seven times a day. My husband looks at me with such a feeling of gratitude. The feeling I have when they both latch on and suckle is a miracle.

  33. I am 50 in a few weeks, my husband and I are born again christians and started anr by accident in January. I have 6 children and 2 grandchildren and have not breast fed for 10 years. My milk is back in now and I have just purchased some really pretty nursing bras. My husband and I are closer than we have ever been but be prepared that once you make the decision to do this it is a real committment and cannot just be stopped.

  34. What a wonderful blessing that you AND your husband are committed to this journey. Sadly, there are many couples where one wants it more than the other and one is left unsatisfied.
    You are correct that if you want to continue to produce milk, one can’t just stop; not to mention the great discomfort that results if nursing is ceased quickly.
    Many couples “dry nurse” or decrease the number of sessions such that there is little or no milk supply, but those bosom times are still precious.
    I too love the closeness that this relationship fosters…it is like no other!

  35. Just wanted to encourage you ladies to read the reply from a husband regarding nursing his wife…his words are sheer poetry as he shares his thoughts at his wife’s breasts. Goto the woman-essence blog and read the comment to the most recent post entitled, “Spring has Sprung, Love in the Air”.
    Enjoy.

  36. Our twins are now two and half months and we are settling into a very cozy routine. This is the best phase where we feel confident that the babies are gaining weight and that my husband is able to nurse me in such a relaxing way at night. Yesterday was the first time in so long I orgasmed almost as soon as he latched on. I’m losing (finally) that pregnant look I always have after childbirth and am back in regular clothes. And I fell very healed from that long and painful delivery of twins. I’m readying my body with lots of healthy food and vitamins to prepare it for my next pregnancy whenever it should happen. Nursing the twins so often every day I’m sure it will take a while. But there could be nothing better than sharing my milk with my dh and knowing we will hopefully be awaiting our fourth munchkin sometime this year.

  37. My husband and I have been married for 3 years. No children . . . yet! All in God’s time. Recently, my husband has expressed his desire to taste my milk. I thought I’d have to fall pregnant first in order to produce milk. I am thrilled to learn otherwise.

    I have been on holiday in America visiting family for 3 months now. In the remaining time leading up to my return to Australia, I’d love to work on inducing lactation. Instructions, please!

    My husband and I have been able to get privacy and be intimate via webcam. I think he’d flip out of sheer delight if I were able to show him what we need to do in order to get the milk flowing for him.

    How exciting it would be to return home to him with this extra special treat . . . my breast milk!

    So, please do give detailed instruction or links for me to learn how to get the milk flowing, etc.

    Thank you!

  38. Our blog isn’t set up for extensive support on adult nursing, but I know that there are forums where you can get more support. Perhaps our readers who are familiar with such forums can email us the links and we will add them to this article. Thank you.

  39. My husband and I have just started ANR last Friday (June 4th) and are trying to relactate. We have already felt a change in my breasts. Is this normal? I have never breastfed any of our 4 children, and our youngest just turned 12, so I am totally unfamiliar with the changes in my breasts. My husband and I already had an extremely close relationship but I already feel that this is bringing us even closer. Our challenge is that he works 90 minutes away and leaves early in the morning and is usually home late in the evening but we know that this is something that both of us want and that our prayers will be answered and our milk will come in. Any tips/tricks would be appreciated.

  40. Yes. It is normal for lactating breasts to be different than non-lactating breasts.

  41. Thanks….but we haven’t started actually producing anything yet. There is a difference in the way my bras are fitting already. I have that fuller feeling. Its awesome.

    Its nice to know that this is something that many find comforting in their relationships.

  42. I actually came across information about this some time ago and thought it was very interesting. I’m not sure how my husband would feel about it, but I was to understand from this article i read that it is much more common than people think…many couples do this especially after a baby. There are also a lot that worked to bring milk in even after not having children or having had them years before. One of the ladies in the article if I recall correctly said it was her who asked her husband to try it after their baby was born, but when the baby was doen nursing he just quit and she thought that was okay and normal. Several years later he asked her if she ever missed that time with him and she had missed it so she and he worked to bring her milk back in. So clearly this isn’t a strange thing and you are NOT alone!

  43. DH and I started dry nursing 3 weeks ago, about 30 mins each night. No plans to bring in milk. His work schedule wouldn’t allow for it. We are in our mid 40′s, last child weaned 13 years ago. My breasts are plumping up nicely from all the stimulation but no signs of milk. We’ve always had a close relationship but this has bumped it up to a whole new level. Our sex life is sizzling, we are calmer, sleeping deeper and yearning for each other when we are apart (like those early months of dating). We hadn’t heard of ANR and didn’t begin this with some formal declaration and plan. We are just grieved by all of the divorces happening in our local Christian community and refer often to the verse about enjoying the “wife of your youth” not the new hottie. So this lead to him laying at my chest alot, which lead to suckling. Which felt amazing, both erotic and bonding at the same time. Not mother/baby like at all to me. My husband is a manly man, both physically and personality-wise. He’s a leader at work, home & church. I say this because I have read comments elsewhere about what kind of people must be into this. I am not his mama, he is not my baby. We don’t even use “Babe” as a term of endearment (not that there is anything wrong with that). It’s funny to me how SOME of the same people who enjoy OS (and swallowing stuff that wasn’t designed for nourishment) get squeamish at the thought of a man at his wife’s breast. We view our bosoming time as “marriage insurance”. It draws us closer in a way nothing else has. Even if a couple skips the suckling part, I still see value in having your hubby lay at your chest each day, feeling your heartbeat and sharing his worries & hopes.

  44. I am currently nursing a baby. I, personally, have little interest in doing this with my husband, but I can understand the feelings of bonding and intimacy this would produce. If nothing else, it’s a great time of snuggling :) My husband takes a little taste now and then, usually while we’re ml, but I think it’s out of curiosity more than anything.

  45. Imhisheismine,
    That is a terrific post! Well said and expresses the bonding so well which adult nursing can bring. The sexual aspect is clearly present, but is tangential to the loving bond this brings.

    Thank you.

  46. Since Iwe married 18 years ago my husband was facinated with my breast, after our first child born and I was breast feeding him my husband enjoyed watching, but when he saw how the child was relaxed to the breast he got jealous and I had to breast feed him sometimes after feeding the baby. When our second child born and he watched the beautiful moment and how my breast was dripping with milk al the time he was so excited and wanted me to stop nursing the baby and nursed him. I stopped nursing the baby at 5 1/2 weeks just to give him the breast. When he sucked the breast he would say I joyfully, I just drink some milk. What a wonderful feeling. I really wasn’t into giving him the breast for a while on a regular basis and he would always ask me to nurse him to sleep. Recently we conqure the major stresses in our life and now I sleep bear just so he can choose which breast he wants to nurse on. I am loving every moment of the bonding and we are not at each other like we use to. It is a pleasure letting him suck the breast until he falls asleep. I could do that every night without getting tired. It is something I look forward to especially when he falls asleep and snores with the breast still clinch in his mouth.

  47. This has got to be one of the best and well written descriptions of what an ANR is. Thank you for clarifying what it is and what it is not. When time allows, my husband and I mutually enjoy this wonderful way of loving. “Bosoming” offers a whole other avenue for spouses to demonstrate their love for one another. It is both sexual and non-sexual all at the same time…ebbs and flows from one to the other. It can be a very relaxing time for both parties to decrease stress or an “appetizer” to the main course!

  48. I have a one year old, who I’ve been nursing since birth. Whenever my husband and I have sex, he enjoys sucking on my breasts. Even if I wasn’t nursing, he’d do that, but occasionally I can see him swallowing my milk. At first, I thought it was strange, but he liked it and said it tasted sweet. He thinks it’s erotic, but I really don’t think anything of it. I just like how it feels when he sucks, but he doesn’t drink my milk other than during intercourse. I’m sure he wouldn’t want any thawed out from the freezer :) In fact, I guess I’m so accustomed to it after a whole year, I was surprised to read this post. I figured we weren’t the only ones who do this, but I’m certain if the baby weans, I won’t keep nursing my husband, even if he wanted to. Just too difficult and inconvenient. But it’s nice for him while it lasts.

  49. I’m a 25-year-old married woman with a 3-year-old child. I’ve been nursing my hubby for the last 4 years. ANR is not as uncommon as people think. In our case, beginning from our wedding night, breast stimulation (deep and prolonged sucking) became an integral part of our lovemaking. It used to be a huge turn-on for both of us. After childbirth, hubby used to stare longingly at my massive, milk-laden boobs while I nursed the infant. It was clear to us that as soon as we resumed our sexual relations, he would go back to sucking my breasts and this time, would actually drink my milk. And that’s exactly what happened! Both of us enjoyed this new aspect of our relationship so much that I weaned off our baby after two years, but continued breastfeeding my hubby. My milk supply is going quite strong and hubby needs to empty my boobs 3-4 times a day. Our sex life has never been better as nursing him gets me horny and we generally end up having intercourse atleast twice a day! We hope to continue with ANR for as long as we can. Would recommend it to all married couples…

  50. i love to breastfeed my husband

  51. My husband is like that, too. A complete alpha male, he loves to relax with my breast instead of a beer. He was always a breast man, but now he’s even more. He is incredible, and I love him so.


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