Breasts, Glorious Breasts

Question:  I’ve been considering breast implants due to volume lost after nursing 4 babies.  I’ve researched a lot about the procedure and all possible complications so am very informed.  Just wanted input on being confident sexually as is as well as your opinions on getting the surgery.

 

A woman’s breast goes through many changes throughout a lifetime.  Different factors such as age, pregnancy, and simple genetics play a part in how they look.  I will say that I believe in trying to change physical appearances naturally, such as working out, before doing something that is permanent. After all, if someone were to want to lose weight they would first exercise and change their lifestyle before undergoing surgery for a quick fix. 

 Sometimes we do need medical intervention to get desired effects.  My husband didn’t get braces until he was in his forties.  I always thought my husband looked fine with the slight overbite that he had but it was something that bothered him for many years. Was it essential?  No.  Did fixing his overbite help his self confidence?  Yes.  Does he look different now?  No, not to me but when he looks in the mirror he sees a big difference. He is happier with how he looks and much more quick to smile now. 

 If getting breast implants is something that will give you higher self esteem and sexual confidence then I say go for it.  Just make sure you do your homework and thoroughly research the procedure as well as the surgeon.  Some women are satisfied with buying bras or lingerie that accentuates their breasts but being unsatisfied may go much deeper for others.  Some women feel like they are taking a ‘costume’ off when removing these lingerie/bras.  Just be sure that you are done having babies because your breasts will continue to change with pregnancy.  

 When women think about getting breast implants it is important to identify why they want this change.  It is a matter of the heart. If it is to get attentions from someone other than their husband or try to become someone other then who they are than the matter goes deeper then augmenting a pair of breasts.  In that case there is probably something that needs to be looked through some counseling.

 You have said that you have educated yourself on the procedure, the good as well as the bad.  Just make sure you look into the surgeon and you may even want to record your conversation with him/her to ensure that you don’t miss pertinent information.  I wish you luck.  Hopefully your procedure will bring you the confidence you are looking for and a smile to your face too.

 

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26 Comments

  1. Great article, PG.

    I think what you said about examining the reasons for wanting the implants is important. While for some who can afford them (without going into debt) it is the same as getting highlights and a great hairstyle, for others they are trying to fix something inside that can’t be fixed by changing one’s appearance. It won’t fix a major self image problem, or resentment of a husband with a wandering eye.

  2. Here is a link that might be worth checking out: http://www.themarriagebed.com/pages/biology/female/brava.shtml. It is for Brava breast enlargement, which enlarges the breasts without surgery. I have not personally done it, but the article would be worth reading as you research your options.

    Also, I have a friend who does x-rays and mammograms. She has talked about the difficulty of getting a good picture around a woman’s implants. She is now a strong advocate AGAINST breast implants. Again, it is worth researching all of the long term effects, including the ability to check the breast for lumps and get a clear mammogram.

  3. Mammograms are definitely something to inquire about. Excellent point, mackeytr!!

  4. Eekers. Make sure prayer is an added element to your question over your breasts. The Lord made you perfect, which to me means you don’t need them regardless of how they look after children. If you really feel bad about them to the degree that a good supportive bra (and supportive husband) don’t ease your mind, give it to God and listen carefully for the answer.

  5. no.. wait .. stop… I have been a flatty all my life, a sagging AA – A on a good day. thank you age and pregnancy . I came from a family of boob jobs going back over 25 years. mom had two, sis had four. now they have indoctrinated a niece… why so many? hmm. infection, scar tissue, pain, boobs so hard they would crush your larnyx with a mere hug. please pray over it. you are how God intended you to be. I know it can be frustrating and tempting, but please pray over it.

  6. The first time I ever entertained the idea of cosmetic surgery was back in Jr High. My Grandfather had these toes that were slightly connected. He had two daughters, six grandchildren and I was the only one that inherited these toes. It is not anything blaringly obvious, the two toes that are located next to my big toes are slightly connected more then they should be. My mother said that they didn’t interfere with the way I walked so she opted to not have them operated on. Growing up I would draw a line on them with a marker when going to the beach or I would try to keep them buried in the sand. No one ever commented on my toes but they bothered me anyway. Flash forward to me giving birth as an adult. The doctor would tell me if my baby was a boy or a girl and I would be yelling “Check the toes!!” to my husband. Two of my children did end up with these toes and they are so proud to have “Mommy’s toes.” So, in my case, I am glad I never had them altered because I think that me having them brings peace of mind to them. I hope they never get as fixated on them as I once did. These are toes I am talking about, so they were easy enough to cover but they made me extremely insecure so I can sympathize with the person who wrote in asking for support. I’m glad our readers are writing in with their personal experiences. Prayer and educating yourself are so very important.

  7. I was a flatty at one time too. I was always VERY self-conscience. I have had my implants for almost 10 years now. I can mark the day that I was no longer worried about whether or not the light was on when having sex because I didn’t like the way I looked. Since then, I am lights on whether it’s overhead, candlle, or black light. I have NO problem. I have also nursed my son who is now almost 5 with no problems. They have changed a bit since then. But I am still happy.

    The main reason why implants get “hard” after surgery is because of the lack of massaging them. You will have to do this just about every day for ever. I gave this job to my husband, who, of course, has no problem with it. I also have an aunt who has had implants for about 16 years now with no problems. Talk to you doctor; go enjoy a free consult. And, most of all do what makes you comfortable.

  8. I off and on have thought about getting implants also, especially after my last child when they were super deflated. I waited because I’m afraid of surgery and possible scarring and so forth. I have had the blessing of them going back to their normal size (although much saggier) after a few years, so I recommend wait and see what happens. Don’t forget to ask you doctor about how he/she plans to deal with the nipple. Some implants decrease the sensation in the breast and nipple area – a definite negative.

  9. Well, I spent a lot of time going back and forth about breast augmentation as well as abdominoplasty. After a lot of prayer and thought, I went ahead with both over a 2 year time period. I have never regretted the decision!

    Research a TON, don’t go into debt to do it, go for quality surgeon over price, and have realistic expectations.

  10. I had a breast aug done after my 3rd, and final child. My breasts were deflated, stretched out and looked like they belonged to a 90 yr old woman. I was so embarrassed that I kept my shirt on during sex. I am VERY pleased with my decision to get implants and so is my hubby! They have been great for my self-confidence and attitude in the bedroom! My husband loved me the way I was before surgery, but he has really enjoyed the change!

  11. I was researching mammograms online and I came across this article. It discusses having mammograms and whether implants interfere. Just thought I would share!!

    http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/breast-implants/AN00419

  12. I’m also contemplating breast surgery, I am a 32A which is tiny and flat and sagging after my babies. I do have reservations and haven’t even seen the doc yet, but I might just go through with it becoz my husband really wants me to have it and I think our sex life would just jump into another dimension!

  13. I had a augmentation about 5 yrs ago and have not once regreted it. I was very flat after three children and didn’t have confidence in wearing a bathing suit or in the bedroom. After prayer and talking to a doctor I decided it was the correct option for me. I didn’t go huge, just filled in what I already had to a small C cup. I look very natural and most people say they didn’t know. My husband was happy whatever I decided but he too is happy. I would NEVER have done it if my husband pushed me into it. It was my idea and decision. I had the right attitude and confidence going into it. Please pray and do your research. I agree the above comments in that I didn’t see it any different than someone getting braces or coloring their hair. Now if I had gotten huge DD’s to get the wrong kind of attention, then that would have been wrong. I for one am very glad I did it.

  14. Yes, time is on your side. I know this story is old, and I wonder what your choice was. As an RN I had plenty of info. re: implants…a half day where an expert in the area came and spoke. For those considering this op the breast become hard due to scar tissue building up around the transplant. Your body sees the implant as a foreign object and tissue grows surrounding it and scars inside. The above is correct re: mammograms. A tumor could be present and not visible on this type of x-ray.
    Also another big thing for me would be nipple stimulation during sex. It can be very difficult to not cut through nerves and/or mild ducts for those that may still want to breastfeed someday.
    And last, in class that day we were shown 100s of pics of surgeries gone wrong…different sized boobs…on the same gal and some pretty bad butcher job on some. I do understand the desire to be larger (cause I am small too), but at what cost and risk? Also, I would ask myself what is my true motivation for doing this? Most of all, pray for the Lord’s guidance and remember that you are fearfully and wonderfully made…

  15. Hey all, I don’t have Implants yet, but have done tons of research. Good luck to all of you trying to make the decision; I also appreciate all the positive comments from those who have gotten it done–it’s really helpful to know I’m not the only one who thinks that way, especially when it seems like I hear so many women speaking so forcefully against it (who have not gotten it done)!

  16. I just have to place a small comment – as being on the other side of the fence – I wish I could give you a few of my inches. Clothes don’t fit, can’t wear button down tops without sewing them shut. And I feel like I’m smothering DH at times – not that HE complains. He,too, loves me as I am, praise God!

  17. It is hard to be on this side of the fence (or bra, as it were). I am 2 months post op from a breast reduction. When considering any elective surgery, it is so important to do your research on the surgery, the doctor, the hospital, and the recovery. I waited 13 years to have mine done, I wanted to be sure that I was done having my family and have my nursing days behind me. Before the surgery I always felt like people were looking at my breasts, I had constant knots in my back, I had regular headaches, I couldn’t find clothes to fit, I felt like I looked fat in everything ( I am a size 8, so not really fat), and I HATED how I looked naked.
    The decision to have the surgery was easy but some people tried to make me feel badly about it because they said “God made you this way for a reason”. I prayed about it and found a real peace with my decision.
    Now, I feel great. I love the way my breasts look. I actually was able to buy a bra off the rack at a store AND I didn’t cry trying it on. I also FEEL sexy most of the time now- a new thing for me.
    My one caution for those considering surgery is to make sure that you know what the recovery will be like. For me, the first week was H**L. I also needed help with my housework and children for 6 weeks. Yup, 6 weeks. But for me, it was worth it. I would do it again. The decision is very personal, whether going bigger or smaller. Don’t listen to other people, listen to the still small voice of God. He knows what is best for you.

  18. I struggle with this as well. I have lost over 50lbs. over the last few years, all in a healthy way. Along with becoming quite fit and healthy, I have also gone from a C cup to barely an A cup. I am still nursing (my 6th) and am hoping I will not deflate any more when my little one weans. I have to special order nursing bras, as it’s very difficult to find them in the stores in anything less than a B cup. I had to send back an A cup I ordered recently as it was too big :(. I’m the only female on my side of the family that’s small. Even my teenaged daughter has more going on in that department.

    I was having a discussion w/ my dh the other night, when we were perusing some fashions online. He joked that one item ” came w/ the breasts” I asked him if he thought that was a good idea. He avoided my question, until I pressed him, at which point he revealed that he’d like it if they were bigger. He wasn’t nasty about it, and I probably shouldn’t have pressed him, but I couldn’t help but feel bad about it. I unintentionally moved away from him, which offended him, and he said that I probably had some things I didn’t like about him either. Ouch! He has apologized, but I can’t get the idea out of my head that he doesn’t like them, and I feel like hiding them.

    He’s a very sweet guy, and has heaped on a bunch of compliments since then (mostly about other things) but I’m having a hard time getting past it. To me, it equates to a woman telling her dh that his penis is too small. UGH! I’m praying for the grace to get over it and try to be confident, but it’s an uphill battle.

  19. sweetonhim: You know the good Lord gave our men so many wonderful qualities but sometimes they really step in it don’t they. It sounds like you two were in a light hearted moment and he got carried away and said something insensitive and then tried to back peddle and only made things worse.

    Here is what I think: Your guy was musing…he didn’t mean he didn’t like your breasts, what he likely meant is that while he is overall thrilled with your weight loss that he misses your former chest. If he is a “boob man” it’s kind of understandable.

    My H is a “butt man” I too lost close to 50 lbs in a healthy way and my H called my rear end “flat” where it used to be high and round. I know he still loves my fanny even though it is no longer what it once was but I also know that he loves me the most . I bet your man is the same way

    Prayers for you and him

  20. Thank you for your reply Tommygirl. I’m sure you are right. It’s funny how a gal can get into great shape, but still have those little things that bother her. (No pun intended :)) My dh is actually quite a leg man, and heaps a lot of praise on mine. The “girls” don’t seem to get quite as much attention as they used to, and of course, I start saying things in my head like “well there’s hardly anything there anyway.” I do wear padded bras when I can, but they’re kind of a pain when nursing, as the cups get in the way. It also feels kind of fake to me. It might make my outfit look better, but my dh and I both know what’s underneath. He has yet to gain guardianship of his eyes, so I can’t help but wonder what he thinks when he sees other women w/ more.

    I will keep reminding myself that God made me in his image, and in the way he saw to be best for me. I will continue to try to be confident. Thanks so much for your prayers!

  21. I guess I see this issue different than some. I have had a breast augmentation and I don’t feel like I wasn’t “accepting how God made me”. If we are going to say that then we should never get our hair colored or our teeth fixed wtih braces. I breast fed 3 babies and ended up a AA and very flat. I saw it as fixing them to how they were before. I realize this is not an option for everyone and I think that is just fine if you don’t have surgery. I just wanted to say that I was very confident with myself before and I love my result after. My husband was fine either way. Most of my friends are surprised when I tell them that I had them done because I didn’t go over the top on size. If you want to do it, then do a lot of reasearch and get a good dr.

  22. I got saline implants in the mid 90’s and a couple of years ago my right one started to leak and deflate during church. I didn’t know what was happening, just that I was having pain (saline hurts when it leaks into your body). Within just a couple of days, it was completely deflated. For the past couple of years I have been trying to decide what to do. I cannot get any feedback from places that can either replace or remove implants. It seems as if, unless you want to go to the clinic and talk to them, they won’t give you the time of day. I just want to have a price quote. And when I contacted my former surgeon (in another state), it cost as much to just remove them as it does to replace them.
    If I could go back, would I get them again? Maybe. Would I get them now? No. In fact, I’m more inclined to just have them removed. I did make a temporary foam breast so I wouldn’t look stupid in public. I didn’t want the questions. My advice, do what you feel you need to do, but decide ahead of time what you will do when they deflate (and they will). Incidently, my dh wants me to just remove them. He loved me as I was and is more concerned with my health (I went from an “a” cup to a full “c” after 3 kids). I will be much happier after I’m even on both sides. Dh has said he doesn’t like the feel of them. I didn’t lose feeling. I just want to look more normal.

  23. For those of you who had implants done, how did you find the doctors you went to? What did you pay – if you don’t mind my asking?

  24. when I had it done more than 15 yrs ago, it was about $3500. Costs almost that much to have one replaced/removed if they rupture. It is painful when they do rupture and without warning. Cost varies depending on location. It can upwards of $6000 now.

  25. I’ve always been curious: do you notice a loss of sensation with implants? Or is boob play (whether sucking, licking, fondling etc) just as pleasurable after as before?

  26. I never had a loss of sensation (slight maybe), but from what I’ve heard other women say, there can be total loss of sensation, perhaps from how large the implants are. I would strongly recommend talking to previous patients of doctors you are considering, to get their imput on the quality and professionalism of the doctor. While i fully understand a woman considering the procedure after having children, if a woman has low self-esteem or dislikes her body, a good doctor will caution her against the procedure because it will not solve those issues.


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