Pegging

Wow what a topic to write on, huh?! For those of you unfamiliar with the above term, “Pegging” is the term given to the practice of heterosexual anal intercourse, where the female wears a strap-on dildo to penetrate the male. Now that you know the topic of this article, look at this email we received from a couple:

“My wife and I like to use a strap-on dildo in our play where she is penetrating me. I’ve heard this practice is growing in popularity as evidenced in self-help movies for couples and has even coined a new term called ‘pegging’. I’m interested in hearing your thoughts on this practice.”

Again, here we are with something that is not specifically mentioned in scriptures. We are left to try and decide for ourselves if this practice falls within the category of sin. Does it involve bringing another person into your marriage bed? No, unless you are watching one of those ‘self-help’ movies mentioned above (ie: porn). We have already established that pornography of any kind is sinful in nature, as it does bring other people into our bedrooms, and causes us to lust. Does it involve incest or bestiality? No, it does not. Okay, so let’s take a more in depth look at this practice.

On this blog we have talked about anal stimulation and full blown anal sex. We’ve outlined things you need to take into consideration, discussed what the bible does and does not say, and we’ve cautioned you to weigh all the pros and cons and come to a mutual decision together with your spouse. Should pegging be any different just because the man is on the receiving end?

We have an article on the female G-spot and how you can use that to help reach orgasm. Then we have another on the male prostate, and how it can also help to produce some wonderful orgasms for the men, both directly and indirectly. We talk about toys, and how they can be used to help our sex lives, by using them on both the husbands and the wives. All of these things, when done between married consenting couples, are okay. So now, what about pegging?

Some men have found that they really do enjoy direct prostate stimulation. Wives can use their fingers and/or toys to do this for their husbands. They also have the option of attaching a dildo to a harness and strapping it around themselves, to use on their husbands. When a wife uses a strap on, it frees her hands up so that they can be utilized in other ways, like stroking the penis or caressing the testicles. While this practice may seem a bit…unusual, I have to stop and ask myself, at what point (if any) does this become sin?

So a woman inserting a hand held toy into her husband in the hopes of giving him pleasure is okay. But if she straps that toy to her body in the hopes of giving him that same pleasure, suddenly people start questioning her (their) morals, Christianity, beliefs, sexual orientation, and more. Why?

I’ve heard the following arguments:

“Well it’s just not natural!” Well that toupee that your uncle wears isn’t natural either. And neither is your sister’s blonde hair that she got out of a box.

“Women weren’t meant to function like that!” Well, the mouth is meant to function as something we use to eat with. It chews our food up and aids in the digestion process. Yet many of us use that same mouth for oral sex, even though one could argue that the mouth wasn’t “meant” to function as a receptacle for a penis.

“That is like a complete role reversal and I can’t imagine God being pleased with that!” I would caution any of you who assume to know what God is thinking. Just because you aren’t comfortable with a particular act, does not mean that it’s inherently wrong or sinful.

“Any man who would want that would have to have some hidden homosexual tendencies!” This is just pure rubbish, and again just one big false assumption. I happen to love my own smell and taste, so much so that I would probably give myself oral sex if I were limber enough to do so. 😆 However, the thoughts of being with another woman and tasting her are repulsive and nauseating to me. Just because I am comfortable with my own body and within my own sexuality doesn’t mean that I have lesbian tendencies.

The most basic fact is that men do indeed have a prostate that, when stimulated, can give wonderful sexual feelings and even orgasm. Many couples describe pegging as something that builds onto their intimacy. I’ve heard one man talk about his wife’s willingness and eagerness to do this for him and how it had really brought them closer together and made him feel unconditionally loved. He valued the fact that his wife did not think he was odd for wanting this. They had prayed about it and did not feel the Holy Spirit convicting them against it, so they were at peace with their decision.

We all do need to keep a couple of things in mind though:

1 Corinthians 6:12 (NIV)

12 “Everything is permissible for me”-but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible for me”-but I will not be mastered by anything.

Romans 14:19 (NASB)

19 So then we pursue the things, which make for peace and the building up of one another.

We need to remember that just because something is not technically a sin, that doesn’t mean that it’s necessarily good for us. God calls us to pursue the things that bring us closer to our spouse and to Him. We should be building up each other and concentrating on those things that are edifying for our marriages. There are those of us who have no desire what so ever to try pegging. It would not benefit our marriage. There are also other Christian couples who embrace pegging in their marriage bed. Whether you do or don’t engage in this practice, we all need to remember to be respectful to each other and to refrain from judgment, because we each have our own personal convictions and walk with our Heavenly Father.

I have voiced to my husband that I am open to the possibility if he ever wanted to try this. He has told me absolutely not. He is not into prostate massage and is uncomfortable with the idea of pegging. I dropped the subject and haven’t brought it back up. He made it known how he feels and does not deserve to be pushed into doing something that he is uncomfortable with. Besides, we don’t need pegging to have a hot and spicy marriage bed!

I realize that this can be a controversial or taboo topic, but I have tried to write out my thoughts and feelings on this subject in a balanced way that is in accordance to God’s word. If you and your spouse are considering trying this, then please pray, asking Him to give you clarity.

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