I’m going to write about the various toys that are out there for our husbands to use. First I wanted to come clean and let you all know that I have had (or should I say that my husband has had) very limited exposure to most of these toys with a reason which I will share at the conclusion of this article.
Pleasure sleeves: These are long, plastic tubes that are filled with a jelly like substance for a tight fit. Sleeves that give a sucking sensation are also available.
Penis Extensions:Here is an example of a simple penis extension that can be worn and enjoyed during intercourse. The extra bumps stimulate the woman’s vagina. Some models focus on adding girth while other add length.
Realistic Vagina and Breasts: Plastic replicas of the real thing. Believe it or not the vaginas even come in ‘doggy or missionary’ positions. Sorry, I can not bring myself to post a link of this particular item.
Penis Rings: These come in either leather, metal or a stretchy plastic. They are used to enhance erections. They do come in different sizes so keep that in mind when purchasing. (Yes, I am talking about penis size as well as ring size.) Here’s an article explaining how to use them.
Vibrating Penis Rings: A penis ring with a bullet attached. I actually have experience with this type of toy. I think I may have gotten more enjoyment out of it than my husband but as we say “A happy wife is a happy husband.” So I guess we both win. This one is supposedly triple the fun.
Pumps: They help achieve an erection in record time. I’m wondering what happens once the pumping stops. Does the blood rush back down from the head, causing the erection to falter? To see what one looks like click here.
Prostate Massagers: I have heard great things about the Aneros Prostate Massager. I mentioned it in an article called “The Male G Spot”. If my husband would let me near his G-Spot, this would be what I would use.
Wireless, Vibrating Thong: A pair of thong underwear for men that has a statically placed vibrator. Just make sure the remote stays within 12 feet or it won’t work. Be warned, there is a picture of a man on the package sporting the thong. It’s a frontal view.
As you can see we have had experience with just the vibrating penis ring. Another plus to that ring, besides being able to use it together, is that the little bullet is removable. If you feel like you need more direct vibrations on your clitoris or it you wanted to vibrate his perineum with it you can do so very easily.
It is not a coincidence that we have not experimented with the pleasure sleeve or fake vaginas. The rings and massagers are something that can be enjoyed together, as a couple without having refractory repercussions. Another issue I have with the fake breasts or vaginas is that they are usually a replica of a porn star. Can the sleeve be jointly used? Sure, but I would much rather use my mouth, hand or vagina to pleasure my man. I guess my bottom line is, if your spouse has a higher drive and needs a release then it would bless him enormously to have you be there for him in a physical way rather then him having to rely on a piece of plastic. Again, this is just my opinion.
If anyone has any experience, with these toys or others, that they would like to share then please feel free to do so in the comment section.
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Christian Nymphos 
Thanks for the article, Peppermint Girl. It seems that tasteful toys for men are hard to find.
I think you were referencing “masturbation sleeves” in your article. I know the term doesn’t sound great but it’s nice to have options for couples that don’t enjoy intercourse during the wife’s monthly cycle. Plus, variety is nice regardless.
I would LOVE to get the vibrating underwear for my husband!! The problem is that he absolutely will not wear a thong. They need to make vibrating boxer briefs!
We actually have no experience with these toys, but I have looked at a couple of penis rings with or without a vibrator and thought it would be fun to try. I have to agree that it is nice the vibrator is detachable – two toys in one! (My husband is also adamantly against “man-thongs” as he calls them!)
I’ve brought up in TMB that I have discovered I really need the clitoral stimulation while PIV and the only thing that came to mind were the penis rings but DH is not too keen on the idea. He’s worried they will be very uncomfortable and that he’ll just plain funny with it on. Any thoughts?
So why is it okay for the women to use a vibrator in the shape of a mans penis but not okay for a man to use a realistic vagina is that not a double standard?
twoinlove – You might try the leather ones. They look very manly. I have it on my wishlist to get for DH.
hisbeautiful – I hear what you are saying and in some ways I agree. The part that I hesitate with is not the actual toy, but the issue of the refractory period. If a husband were to MB into a toy rather than with his wife and then would not be able to get an erection or come when his wife wants to have sex then I have a problem. A wife who uses a toy during sex with her husband can still take his penis as well, but a man who comes into a toy, can’t usually maintain his erection or get another one quickly enough in the same sex session.
So I don’t have as much of a problem with a man masturbating into a sleeve if he is still available when his wife wants it.
hisbeautiful, each of us has a unique situation. I would rather help my dh out personally rather then having him use a fake vagina or sleeve. That is just my opinion. A woman’s toy has to be shaped like a penis in order for her to insert it and get the stimulation that she needs. Some couples agree not to buy any toys that are bigger then the husband. If that helps them feel more secure then I say, go for it.
This is a question that I have always had, why does a toy for a man need to be a replica of another women’s vagina, anus or breast?
And my question would be the same in reverse. We don’t personally use toys. We do see the double standard with the use of them though. Just playing devils advocate to get some good conversation going.
A woman’s toy doesn’t need to look like a replica of a penis, but it does need to be shaped similarly, for insertion. It has to be oblong or cylindrical, which is very phallic like. Similarly, a man’s toy doesn’t NEED to look like a realistic vagina/anus because a regular, generic looking pleasure sleeve would work just the same, as long as it had a hole in it.
“Just playing devils advocate to get some good conversation going.” I like the conversation. Bring it on. I like hearing different perspectives.
I’m glad you are here, hisbeautiful!! 8)
I think you are very fortunate that you do not need to use toys. A lot of women have a difficult time climaxing. I strongly believe that the right toy, plus self exploration can help many women learn to orgasm. Let’s take a rabbit vibrator for an example. Once a woman can climax with the phallic part inserted and the bunny ears stimulating her clitoris then she can communicate to her husband what she may need to get there. They can help us learn our bodies plus sometimes women need more stimulation. Men are not built the same way.
I love toys. I particularly like the reciprocity of toys. As noted in the Anal Sex columns, if the man wants to have anal sex with his wife, I think it is perfectly fair for him to take an anal plug or similarly sized dildo into his own rear-end. That my DH has a prostate and LOVES it being stimulated has only brought us closer. Rather than using it stand along on me, I prefer the plug in my bottom while he’s also making love to me.
Some other toys not mentioned are a blindfold, restraints, paddle and love-making furniture. My DH lasts a goodly while, but will usually expend himself in me. He prefers to use his mouth or hands to make me climax if I haven’t achieved it during intercourse. That being said, he has no ego involved regarding toys and will use them with delicious impunity on me.
We don’t have sleeves, as I just thought they looked odd, but I guess there’s no difference other than the refractory period. Maybe I’ll get him one for a present when I have to go on a business trip!
Thanks for the article! Men don’t seem to have the same nice array of toys women have and I liked the discussion as I love to please my hubby!
my wife and I purchased a “clone a willy” kit. It was great fun to make it together and now it’s not some random toy that looks like someone else, but an exact replica of myself. which is great for if i’m away on business. we would recommend it.
I heard of a couple who made the chocolate clone a willy and after they were done they cut it up in to small pieces and served it on brownies to their care group. LOL!!!!!
Here is the clone a willie link for those who may be interested.
http://www.amazon.com/Empire-Labs-Clone-A-Willy/dp/B000XF0YK8/ref=pd_bbs_1?ie=UTF8&s=hpc&qid=1220793184&sr=8-1
“I heard of a couple who made the chocolate clone a willy and after they were done they cut it up in to small pieces and served it on brownies to their care group. LOL!!!!!”
That is WAY to FUNNY! LOL!!!!!!
Question: If a penis shaped dildo is essentially cast from someones penis is it cheating to have a dildo of this kind? Technically it is someone else’s…
I have no problem with toys that are phallic and general but I do wonder about the connotations of a dildo cast from a strangers member.
txbuilder, I am confused. Are you asking if it’s cheating if a woman made a dildo using a cast of man besides her husband?
The vibrators and/or dildos that are carried in stores or online are hand crafted. Some say they are a replica of a porn star and it states it on the packaging. Personally, I do not endorse these types of toys.
Some couples are not comfortable with using a toy that resembles a penis. These people usually rely on a vibrator that is egg or bullet shaped.
You got it right, that is what I was trying to ask. Good answer…I had wondered how that worked out with the way you had described them here on the web page. I never have bought one, I have jusst seen them made on discovery channel and they were are replica type. Handcrafted okay, phallic design okay, another man’s member I dunno. But this clears it up.
hey, if you want a low-budget solution to vibrating undies, get a remote control egg, take a pair of comfy undies that hubby likes & you like, take a needle & thread, some fabric (you only need what, 2-4 square inches of fabric? just enough to make a little snug pocket that will hole the remote egg right where the wearer wants it…then have at it!! you can do this with panties or thongs or boyshorts for the ladies..why not?
I used a fleshlight on my dh for 3 months after having our first kid until I was able to have sex. My hubby loved it, he sayed it felt so tight and realistic like a vagina. I strongly suggest this for couples who just had a kid. The only thing you want to look out for is to not buy one that is molded after an actual person. We found there are many realistic toys for both guys and girls out there that are crafted from scratch (meaning there were no models used) because I didnt like the thought of my hubby slipping into a mold of another woman.
I think men should play as well, I know for me I enjoy it quite a bit when my husband explores and plays for me. As many have stated here, there are times when it is practical for our husbands to take it upon themselves to be pleasured and as I mentioned for me toys make it all the more fun to watch. We have a wide variety of toys that I purchased for my husband to use which has opened him up sexually tremendously.
My husband just got a fleshlight because I am about ready to have our first baby and so we agreed it would be OK. I definitely think men have to be careful about using toys that only pleasure them, but I know my husband fantasizes about me when using it and to help we often use it together, I will hold it or put it between my legs, it makes him feel very loved!
Wondering about the penis ring-does it just go on the shaft or around the testicles as well? I’m assuming either way is technically okay, but is there a way that’s better, pleasure-wise?
Did you get a fleshlight that was crafted from scratch or molded after someone? Do you know a website you can find one crafted from scratch? How much do they usually cost?