I was really humbled recently by a message my pastor gave at church on prayer. It also reminded me of emails I have seen by people writing in to us saying, “please don’t tell me to pray about it” or “I have prayed and nothing has changed” … well, has it? I grew up being taught that God answers prayer three ways…. yes, no or wait. Wonderful. So how do you know what he said when he doesn’t audibly answer you?
God is our Abba Father. Just like any daddy, he wants to give to us. But do we really know how to ask him for what we want? But I hear you saying, “Doesn’t God already KNOW what I want? Why should I ask him for it if he already knows?” Great question. Are you ready for the answer?
God wants us to ask because it REMINDS US where every good gift comes from. I am reminded of my kids with this thought. My son will sit around complaining to us about how all his friends get a bigger allowance a week than he does, when he sits around the house and does nothing to earn more than he does. What he forgets is when he needs new clothes, we buy them for him. He doesn’t have to provide his own. When he does us a huge favor, we usually reward him by getting him something he really wants…like a new ZEN MP3 player he has been asking for. He didn’t have to buy it. He doesn’t appreciate what we do give him and take that into consideration. We are like that, too. We get things from God on a daily basis that we don’t even thank him for. In this economy, do you have a job? Thank God for it. Do you have clothes on your back? A roof over your head? Food on your table? Thank God for it. When the Israelites were wandering in the desert, God provided manna for them every day. What did they do? Complain that they didn’t have water. He gave them water….there was always something new to complain about, but never once do we thank God for what he provides us already without asking. So when we have a real prayer need, God wants you to ask, so that when you receive, you will thank him and praise him for answering your prayer.
When you pray, do you really believe that God will give it to you? If you pray half heartedly, what does that tell God? “Well, God, I really need this, but I am not sure that you’ll give it to me.” If you need to know where your next meal is coming from, pray to God about it and believe that he will provide it. Have you ever heard of George Muller? He opened up orphanages for children in the mid 1800’s, never requesting financial support, but teaching the children about having faith in God for what they needed. Many times, he received unsolicited food donations only hours before they were needed to feed the children, further strengthening his faith in God (Wikipedia) George would pray for the needs and believed that the needs would be met. And they usually were. In the 1870’s, 2,000 orphans were being cared for in 5 homes by him and his wife. Doesn’t this show you how God answers prayer?
When you pray, are you in a right relationship with God? It always amazes me that when we have a crisis in our country, what is the first thing people always do? They start praying. They pray to God, who they may never talk to on a regular basis, but expect him to answer when they need him most. “Why didn’t God save our home in this disaster?” “Why didn’t God stop this from happening?” Our leaders who try so hard to keep God out of our schools, want us to pray to God when we are devastated by tragedy. God bless America comes out more often than not during these times. Dear readers, God can answer everyone’s prayers. God can bless us all, but when we sin against him and when we are the biggest hypocrites about him until we really need him, he is more likely to answer someone who obeys him and has a personal relationship with him. Get to know God on a regular basis, not just when you need something. When you know him, you will believe that he will meet your needs and answer your prayers.
There are several verses in the bible that tell us that we need to be right with others before God will answer us. Mark 11:25, Matthew 5:23-24, and 1 Peter 3:7 all document the need to be sure that we are right with family, friends, neighbors and spouses so that it doesn’t hinder our prayer.
Be sure that your prayer leaves room in case what you want isn’t what’s best for you. God’s will is ALWAYS better than your own will. I know that I would LOVE to pray that God would give us the money to be able to afford better things…newer cars instead of used ones, a house of our own instead of a rental, but I do realize that if God felt that I needed it now, we’d have it. It isn’t His will that we have all this stuff right now. So when I pray, I always pray that God’s will be done, not mine. I had a dear friend that died of breast cancer. All the while everyone was praying for a miracle for her to be completely healed, I continued to pray that God’s will be done. My friend’s story reached A LOT of people on Caring Bridge. She wasn’t healed in this life, but God healed her when she stepped into Heaven. God has a plan for our lives. It doesn’t hurt to ask, believe that he can give it, but be sure to remember that God’s way is always the best way. If it isn’t in our best interest, then it won’t be answered the way we want it.
Lastly, be sure to pray in Jesus’ name. Think about it. God sacrificed a lot for us. Jesus paid the ultimate price for us. He has all the wounds to prove it in his hands, his feet and his side. His ultimate sacrifice makes it possible to have the most awesome relationship forever with his father, but he did tell us one thing in John 14:13 “And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father.” Jesus is our intercessor with the Father. His name is precious and holy and it reminds me daily of his sacrifice for me.
Let me tell you of a recent prayer that was answered faster than any I have asked for in the past. I had a big problem at work that looked so completely impossible to fix. So one morning before work, I got down on my knees…something I rarely ever do I am ashamed to admit….and I prayed to God. Sincerely, earnestly, and broken, I asked Him for help in this situation and for him to show me His will in all of this. No sooner had I said amen, my phone rang. And on the other end of the line was the answer to my prayer. I found out later that I was the answer to this other person’s prayer as well. God knows what we need. He is waiting for us to ask him. For those of you who write us and say, “Please don’t ask me to pray about it”, we will continue to tell you to pray. We have all seen and felt the power that is in our prayers to God the Father. We have seen and witnessed all the blessings He can bestow on us. We have seen His miracles! I think at one time or another, each one of the Spice girls here at CN have seen miracles in our own marriages and our marriage beds, so yes, we will continue to tell you to pray. We have seen it’s power and want you to witness it, too.
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Christian Nymphos 
I couldn’t agree more! I’ve said it before I’m a huge fan of prayer. I’ve been saved, redeemed,a born again christian most of my life (39 years) and I’ve seen God do some pretty amazing things.
We’ve taken our 9 children on many mission trips mostly to Mexico over the last 15 years for that very reason. It’s a great way to build faith. The group we go with also knows the importance of prayer. Each day we have to cross the border to go in. This alone is scary. The border guards can turn you away at there own discretion, and most of them don’t like christians! So we pray….and we always get through. Jack (the mission leader) said 1 time he didn’t ask everyone on the bus to pray, and that day they were turned away. A two hour bus ride for nothing. He said he never forgot after that. God wants us to pray. We received money from people we didn’t even know, to make these trips possible, and usually more money than was actually needed! I’ve seen God quiet storms (just around our tent) for these evangelistic meetings. One time the power was out everywhere, except our sound system in the middle of the park in Mexico. What an awsome God we serve!
He can take care of things on his own, but he wants us to pray and talk to him. This is how we build our faith and grow.I think it’s a good idea to be in the habit of prayer always.We need to remember to talk to the Lord even when you don’t need anything.We should always have an attitude of praise and thankfulness! How would we like it if our children or friends only talked to us when they needed something? God should be our best friend. The closer we walk with him the easier it is to know what he wants for us and what his answer is to our prayers.
I learned at a young age the power of prayer, which I am thankful for, but anyone, new believers or ones that have been for a long time can and should learn to pray. It’s the best part of our christian life. Just knowing we can talk to God anytime. I pray about everything, from helping me find misplaced car keys, taking the wheel of my car in a snow storm, and even asking the Lord to give me great sex with my husband! He always answers. Yes, I believe in the power of prayer, I’d be a fool not to! Thanks for another great article.
Great thought to start my morning. Thanks for the encouragement.
This came at the perfect time for me. Thank you for the encouragement. God has been showing me so much regarding prayer, as the relationship between me and my darling has been struggling in recent months and coming to your website today and seeing this was just further assurance that the Lord will bring us through this and make us stronger.
In fact, just as I was writing this, my darling called me (he never calls during the day because of work) just to talk. Which was an answer to prayer for me, knowing that he is continuing to work through our situation.
Praise the Lord!
Hi Jada,
I will be praying for you and your honey. Your ‘situation’ is close to God’s heart. Your posting here gave me, and many others, the opportunity to hear you and offer prayer on your behalf.
Can you text your darling during work hours? I have used this medium of comms. for a few months and we have had some otherwise difficult issues ironed out by this form of contact.
Receiving a text means he does not have to answer immediately, unlike a phone call. It’s agony waiting for his reply but nevertheless, you can let him know you are thinking of him.
My texts were bland and boring at first until I got more bold and sassy ! A cool way of reminding him that you are his when he gets home 😉 Turn on the heat, lady. Way too many cool women towards their men…hot and spicy Jada…can you see it ? YYeeeaaahhhh.
smP
Thanks Smokeypuss,
My honey gets very distracted when he gets calls/texts throughout the day, and has asked that I don’t do that while he’s at work/school, just so he can stay focused. It is a blessing though to have heard from him, especially because of how distant he has been in recent weeks.
And thank you for the prayers as my darling and I walk through this valley. I know the Lord is going to use this for his glory and that the relationship between me and my sweetie is going to become all the stronger through it!
blessings to you
This was an awesome article. I am thankful for this website and all the help it has given me.
I echo the comments to this post, thank you! We can not do it alone … we must ask in faith for His help in His way and time — that is the hard part for me, knowing if I am asking in faith. We should not walk alone; the purpose of life is to become like Him.
Spicynutmeg,
That maybe one of the best posts I have read on this blog. What a great reminder, especially going to a new year.
Thank you for this re-post! So many days I find myself so busy with everything except the Lord. How sad that I let everything else become so much more important! And what a difference prayer in the morning makes on just the hum-drum things of the day, let alone the big problems we face!
It’s so important to be reminded not to let the most important part of our day/lives be pushed into that category of “things to do if I get the time.” He certainly has time for us, We should make time for Him!
Thank you!
Prayer is amazing, having that connection with the Almighty God. Knowing that He cares enough to listen ’cause I’m pretty sure that He is far busier than I am. Actually that’s a good reminder that I should probably take the time to listen to my kids more, knowing that my God listens to me regardless of how busy He is.
Anyway, sometimes the answers to prayer that we receive can be vastly different from what we expect. It’s important to remember that God is not a magic wishing well or vending machine and sometimes His answers to our prayers can vastly exceed all of our expectations. An example of this is a recent concern that I had for my husband, he was spending more time online gaming then with me. I got jealous of the computer :p. I prayed about it, I prayed that his desire would be for me and he’d get bored of the game. Funnily enough it was my desire for hubby that went through the roof. Shortly after he walked away from the online games. I never expected that I would be the one affected by my prayer in such an intense way but regardless I am grateful, our relationship has changed and improved in so many unexpected ways and after several rough years, it’s such a blessing.
needed that today, as I struggle to know how to pray for a current situation. Or rather, I know I should pray for His Will, but putting it into practice is sometimes hard. Thanks for the reminder and the re-post.
Thank you for thsi article. I wanted to say that my husband and I have had some troubles in our marriage. For me it was a past sin that I could not get over. It would emerge from time to time in our lives and I would grow into a woman who was not reasonable. Holding accounts against a forgiven man, God’s child. I did something different recently when this ugliness reappeared in my life. I asked God to remove it. He brought to my mind not an answer, but a question. “Are you the wife I created you to be?” That question began a search in my heart, in the Bible and on the internet, which is how I found you. I began using a 10 step program I created a regimen that allowed me to take 10 steps toward my sexuality with my husband. These steps did something–blossomed in me. I began to have a sexual awakening much like you talked about in one of your articles here. It was like I was reading about “me!” Now? The bedroom is sweet, precious, hot and erotic! I am not afraid to please my husband, nor am I afraid to be pleased by him. This all transpired in about a months time. By the end of the month, I was awakened and interested in ways I cannot explain. I have developed another regimen for myself and that is to be in line with priorities I have set for myself as myhusbands wife. One of them, is to spend 30 minutes a day on your website. I am liberated to be the sexual woman God made me to be now. Thank you!
I would love to hear your ten steps towards sexuality with your husband if you would like to share here. Sounds awesome and I applaud you.
thank you! When I wrote that one, it is one of a few that I felt were truly God speaking and not me.
Sure I can share. I created these based on my own buried interest and what I thought my husband needed/deserved from his wife. These are in order of which I did them, 1 being my first step and 10 being the final step that kept me going in the right direction and lead directly into a vibrant sexual awakening for me:
1. I had to find something to relax me. I was upset over my husbands past sins and needed desperately to calm down. I do not have dependency issues so in my first step, I chose a bottle of champagne. This choice doesn’t give hang overs and does not create a lack of memory if only a couple of glasses. I realize its not for everyone but it worked for me. We made love this night and it was exactly what I needed and it was a part of a sexual healing for me as I frequently pictured my husband with the other woman. Some how this first step was crucial and it gave blessings to me as it gave me something to crave…. my husband.
2. I needed to become uninhibitted but felt too “lady like” to proceed. I do not normally drink so the effect of being uninhibitted by the champagne caught mem off guard. But it was still not quite what I wanted so I began searching around on the internet and that is when I came across this site. Specifically, the articles on oral sex and FE blessed me. As well as the FAQ. So I accomplished becoming uninhibitted by educating myself and having a bit more champagne before we made love. This happened for me on the second night.
3. I needed to give myself compeletly to my husband, without holding certain area’s back. This took a consious decision and an act of trust and faith. But I had created my list long before I stumbled on this site. Well, not long, but a few days before. The point is I knew what I needed to do but didn’t know how to go about it. This site helped me out with this objective. The articles that referenced the bible verses helped a great deal. I began to realize that my body was also his body, and his body was also mine. In addition, there were certain sexual acts that I forbid my husband to perform on me, because they were acts he performed with the person who had haunted me for so many years. I gave this up to him with no exceptions and no “take-backs.” 🙂 It was a freedom for me…. and also knowing I would be the only one to receive this from now on (as he is a changed man and has been for a awhile) really was a turn on.
4. Reach out to him and communicate what I wanted. Again, this site helped me gain the courage as well as the words to do this. I did this on our fourth night together of making love…which I really believe was sexual healing.
5. Find a way to increase my sex drive. In the beginning of my list, before I found this site, I didn’t know how to do this. But I knew it had to be done if my objective of giving myself to my husband regularly were to take place. So I began thinking sexy thoughts and it was on this day that I began a regimen of visiting this site every day for about 30 minutes. My brain is where I increase my desires…not really my body.
6. Perform a sexual act to completion on my husband. This was most gratifying for both of us. The website didn’t help there, but I did learn a lot! It simply took courage from me and I am happy to say I found it 🙂
7. Begin to prepare myself for my husband daily so that I do not have to say no to him. I find that most of my past excuses had to do with my legs not shaved for my hair not clean. Silly stuff! So, I figured if thats what stood in my way, I was going to eliminate it! On day 7, I began preparing myself each day for him. Shaving, showering, little make up that I know he likes, hair…etc. This act I have also included in my regimine and he enjoys it very much> The blessing is—so do I! Its like I am pampering myself because I know joy will come to me afterwards. Sometimes its morning and sometimes its evening. But I do get it done. and so far, faithfully!
8. Initiate. Big one for me! My desire before all this was to be the most squeakly clean church lady that ever lived! Now? I’m a bit naughty too 🙂 Or at least I am compared to what I was before!
9. On our 9th night I wanted to do something a little out of the ordinary for me. I wanted to try something different. So I skipped the panties and at one point in the day I scooted next to hubby and allowed his hands to rome. When he found something “missing” he became very excited and I liked being able to get that response out of him 🙂
10. Our 10th night was the final night of sexual healing. I included more champagne, I used a few words I would never have used before and I told my husband what I loved about him. This night my objective was to just slip back into a normal well and healthy sexual attitude. I got way more than I bargained for, however, as I have stirred my sexual appetite, educated myself, liberated myself from past misconceptions about what is allowed and not allowed, and completely became a different woman. This website was instrumental in my awakening and I am very thankful!
Now keep in mind that I have an innocent look about me that I always thought I had to fullfil. I have been able to keep myself from straying into any area that was traditionally thought to be off limits. I have a reputation amongn friends to be a sweet girl who’s at best, “cute.” It was not easy for me to beat this and become who I really always have been. Who God created me to be. I have known for a while that I have kept my sexuality at bay. Once I made a choice and found this site and created my list, I began to live like I could have lived for 20 years. I am now 39. But I feel 23 🙂
I hope this helps a bit. I am no expert and I just have begun to find myself and who I am. But it has worked for me.
God bless you!