This past Sunday while at church listening to a message from Phillipians, my mind started to wander a little bit to the blog here. Not only was it a good message for any Christian, but it would really work well in the our marriages as well. Here is the passage I am referring to
Philippians 2:1-5
1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Now, Paul wrote this letter to the Philippian church while he was in prison, so “make my joy complete” is talking about him since he started the church there in Philippi, but let’s look at these verses and a few others with a little twist.
1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, As Christians, we should have joy and encouragement with Christ as our head.
if any comfort from his love, Jesus’ love for us paid the ultimate sacrifice for us. In that, I take great comfort
if any fellowship with the Spirit When the Holy Spirit indwells us upon our salvation, we should feel a deeper sense of fellowship with Christ since he lives within us.
if any tenderness and compassion As a Christian, don’t you see things in a different light? Don’t you tend to look on others with more compassion than when you were a nonbeliever?
2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Likeminded…like Christ, we should strive to love one another as Christ loved us, we should strive to be more like Christ in what we say and what we do, with the same purpose as Christ…to love and serve others.
3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
These last two verses are the ones that made me stop and think. I am in the process of reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman…why? Because I don’t know WHAT my love language is…go figure. So here I am reading about all these married folks who don’t know why their marriage is falling apart….and it is because they are not speaking the same language…love language that is. The purpose behind this book? To teach you how to recognize the love language you speak and what your spouse speaks, and how to USE that knowledge to show love to your spouse. To fill their love tanks. Chapman asks the folks in his book to consider their spouse before themselves. I haven’t finished the book yet, but I believe my husband’s love language is Words of Affirmation. (He can correct me if I am wrong….I haven’t read all 5 Love Languages yet) I try as much as possible to make sure he knows how much I appreciate what he does because he does A LOT in this household. I had to drop my own “selfish ambition” in order to meet a need that he has. I leave him notes on his Facebook page to publically let everyone know how much I love and appreciate him. I am turning into his biggest cheerleader. Why? To get rid of my own selfish ambition and to consider him over myself. Yeah, it’s real easy for me to follow my own interests and needs, but Jesus wants us to go beyond that and put the needs of our husbands before our own needs. Is that an easy job to do? No, but it is SO worth it. Not only do we make them feel good, but it feels good to do it, too.
Think about this….(Philippians 2:5-8)
5Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
6Who, being in very nature[a] God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
7but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature[b] of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death-
even death on a cross!
What did Jesus owe you? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Yet, he voluntarily took on human nature and became a servant. He was obedient to his own death. A death he didn’t deserve, but he loved us that much. Commit to serving the needs of your spouse. Move toward sacrificing the things you want for the things your spouse wants and needs. I need to try to take this challenge on more for my hubby. Will you join me?
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Christian Nymphos 
Thanks for this SpicyNutmeg it is such a good reminder that as christians our priority should be to SERVE our spouse. I have just finished listening to The Peasant Princess sermon series (great) after having it recommended here and that has been so helpful to me too. Again the over-riding message was “serve your spouse”… I am finding that if I look to and pray for opportunities to serve my husband in love problems are diffused so much more quickly.
I’ll take up the challenge. Satan has a field day with us by putting those selfish desires in us. When we are in selfish mode, we are blind to our husband’s acts of love. It happened to me. One of the problems is that we weren’t speaking the same love language. I have since recognized his acts of love and he too is learning mine. We are closer now than we have been in a long time since I repented of my selfishness.
Thank you for posting this topic. I’m in need of a huge dose of humility with my husband. Recently I’ve just felt lost with my classes and life in general. I think this will help me help my husband.
Thanks again,
Rebecca