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Sept.12: The Power of a Praying Woman by Stormie OMartian
Weekly poll #5: How often do you and your spouse date?
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We try to get a date every week, but more often than not there is a week or two each month when it doesn’t work. I love date night 😀
My sister and I trade kids at least once a month. She takes my kidos overnight one weekend, and I get hers the next. It is a great system since it makes us go out just the two of us. We don’t even always go out, we drop the kids at her house and come home for a quite evening.
We didn’t date for years when our oldest children were young. There seemed to be a lack of time and finances and we didn’t understand the importance of it. Lately, we’ve been trying to get out for dates, beyond the running errands together. We strive for once or twice a month. The reality is probably closer to once every two or three months.
Budget constraints often demand that we make our date night at home
Every Friday afternoon, my kids and I ravage the library. We carefully choose movies for the evening and load the reading kids with books.
I make plenty of tasty food, clean the kitchen counters and empty the sink into the dishwasher. I strive to leave the kitchen clean (ha!ha! with teens ravaging my fridge all the time) then take a few minutes making sure lines are drawn about who is in charge. All the planning means I am ready for our date night by 6 or 7.
Why the run down on how we do our date? Simply because it takes an organized home to achieve a really undisturbed date time. I cannot fully relax when I know the kids are climbing the walls in boredom, their tummies are growling and the kitchen resembles WWII. Our kids are well behaved but they all have their squirrely side thus I prepare thoroughly for date nights.
hard to answer – we don’t go ‘out’ that often, but we don’t have kids so we’ll rent a movie or I’ll make a special dinner and we’ll flirt all evening long. I think I might call that a date 🙂
When we have to go shopping, we usually go together. We pretty much do everything we can together and are seperated mostly just for work, neither of us often go hang with friends apart from each other.
So we have special times, just the two of us, often, but we don’t actually ‘go on a date’ once a month or anything. (and actually,I do like going out, but I HATE crowded restaurants. My perfect date would be a restaurant late in the evening when few ppl are there, or takeout brought here to candlelight or taken on a picnic at a park on a cool day)
Now that I have older children,(built in babysitters) my DH and I can go more often, and we do a lot even if only to the grocery store or Home depot. We also go out with other couples more often. As for a “date night” about 1 every other week. My older children are great about taking care of the other kids, but I always make sure to ask if they’re free and not just assume. Aferall they have lives too. (The plus of a big family). 🙂
Not as often as we like. Our youngest has a potentially fatal food allergy. Finding a sitter is not as simple as hiring a teen from the neighborhood or church. My mom watches the kids while we are at work so I hesitate to ask her to do extra. My in laws try to keep them over night from time to time but there is no set schedual.
When we were first married, we said we’d do it at least once a month. That never actually happened. It’s a sporadic, occasional thing…
I’d love for it to be more often.
Since we’re both starting new jobs this month and next month and relocating to a new city…I hope we’ll have more chances for it since our stress levels will drop significantly.
Why don’t you plan a fun, surprise date for your husband this week. 8)
I answered once or twice a month, we don’t usually plan them, it just always gets to a point when we are both like “It’s time for us to go out! Wanna go tonight?” I am SO thankful that my mother in law, both my parents, and my sister all live close by and help us with watching the kids on a very regular basis. Every so often we have a home date too. One of the most fun things we ever did was after the kids were dropped off elsewhere, we came home and turned off all the lights and played naked hide and seek! It was very erotic and exciting. 🙂
Naked hide and seek! What a creative idea!
For what it is worth …
When our marriage was the most rocky a few years ago, we hardly ever went out on dates, despite lots of people suggesting it.
In the last year or so, I have tried much harder to make sure something “datish” happens most weeks. Having “built-in” babysitters now is great, and really makes it much easier to make sure we have a date night. I’d say we are probably 2 or 3 times a months now. AND our marriage is much stronger for it.
What I am working on doing now is trying to make my DW feel more special with the date night … Asking her a couple of days in advance, planning fun and different dates, etc. I’m not that good at it, but at least I am trying …..
Xenon, I think that’s great that you’re putting so much thought into date nights with your wife. Speaking as a wife, I can tell you that it really is true that it’s the thought that counts. I always feel so special when I know my husband has put thought into something, and planned ahead of time. Like gifts for instance, there have been a few so-called “duds” through the years, things that I wouldn’t have picked for myself, or can’t really use, (like one time a toothbrush cover, because I’m always telling him “Please shut the lid before you flush or you will get germs all over the toothbrushes!” and he being a non germophobe, didn’t know that covers actually harbor bacteria….), but I can see his thought process behind it, and see why he would think I would like it. (For the record he usually does very well!) And it touches me to know that he was really thinking of me, and doesn’t just wait until the night before and go buy some generic wife gift. 🙂 So anyway, I know you weren’t talking about gifts, lol, but my point is that I would rather my husband put thought into doing something for me, and it be a total flop, just knowing that he was thinking about me makes me feel loved and cherished. 🙂 So keep it up!
Xenon
I thought the same thing when I read your comment. What a sweet guy for trying to plan dates.
For the simple fact that we’re trying to move out of our apartment and spend every available minute packing or fighting with the selling agent to get needed information for the home purchase.
Plus, he’s working right now – I’m off for the summer. So, to him, coming home to a hot meal and not needing to leave again is his idea of heaven (although I’d rather go out since being in the apartment with nothing in it is a bit depressing to me).
Hey SpicyBride,
Pretend that you are the hired help for one of the evenings this weekend.
Before you begin this fun treat, make sure your bathroom area is cleaned to your satisfaction.
1. If you have an apron, pair it with your sassiest bra and panties/thong. Ready them beside a pair of your highest shoes to show off your sexy hiney and legs. (Oil your legs beforehand to make them catch the light).
2. Place candles in the bathroom if you have any to create mood lighting. If not, keep the bathroom light off and use the hallway light or whatever.
3. Ready some of your favorite music and make sure you can hear it!
4. Get towels, some kind of oil, a scrubber for his back, and body wash or gorgeous soap for soaping his entire body.
Stage one : Choose your timing and set your mind on ‘sexy serving girl’ mode. Get yourself dressed, turn on the mood lighting and music, and invite him into his private spa for an all over body treatment. Don’t worry if you don’t feel up to it yet, just follow along with the plan. Treat him as a professional would and make him feel special.
Stage two : After cleansing his body and getting him to brush his teeth, lead him to a chair in the bedroom for a hair treatment. Comb his hair and then give him a scalp massage. Lead down to his shoulders and pay special attention to his neck.
Stage three : Ask him to lie down on the pre-laid-out towels on the bed and begin to massage his back from the toes up his legs and then to his back, especially the lower region. Again, get those shoulders, they are crucial.
Stage four : He turns over and you begin his front massage from the toes up. No sexual stuff for the time being, merely focus on making him feel you everywhere.
Stage five : I’m signing out lady, you’re on your own… 😉
He doesn’t like baths (unless it was the spa tub we had in our condo rented for the honeymoon…gosh, I miss that thing!) and will only take neck massages and upper back due to being super ticklish. Some men don’t like that sort of thing (and my apron has been packed along with all of my lingerie for our move).
I appreciate the thoughts and ideas. However, he’s just not into that sort of thing. (And he’s pretty opposed to oils of any kind being used on him unless it’s for…ya know.)
Smokeypuss, what a wonderful idea! I know that your comment was for SpicyBride, but I think my hubby would love this. Will keep it in mind the next time we are away for the weekend or when others might have our kids for the night. Thanks so much!
Hey SpicyBride,
No sweat. What works for some is not the thing for others.
Isn’t that what we are all about….learning how to attract and love on our husbands (and wives for you dear men who read and post here) for who they are?
What would your darling really enjoy?
Hi Clovesosweet,
My husband loves to be pampered which sounds similar to your man. Have fun when you get round to spoiling him. I am off to baby mine for the evening 😉