Your mission this week is inspired by all the spring cleaning I’ve been doing lately. My spring cleaning always involves a lot of de-cluttering. I got to wondering about the clutter that ends up in our marriages; extra stuff we’ve taken on that is either simply in the way of us experiencing what we need in our marriage or that is actually taking away from the joy of what we could be sharing with our spouse. It might be something that looks good initially, but it’s become a distraction. If you can relate to the analogy, have a look at whether your relationship could use some things being let go of. Some things might be for others to have and other things just need to be dumped. What’s in the way of you and your husband experiencing all that you should in this season of your lives?
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Christian Nymphos 
Uh oh! No comments yet? *in a sing-song voice* People aren’t being very truthful!! lol Just kidding…
Two things that I’ve noticed in my marriage that are hinderance rather than a help are putting my husband before God and being overly sensitive.
Before I got married, it was easy to have a daily quiet time and a flourishing reationship with God, but after I met my soulmate, my focus shifted drastically. We’re coming up on three WONDERFUL years of marriage in a few days, and I still have a hard time getting back into the routine of God first, husband next. It may seem that I’m showing him an abundance of love, but without daily rooting that love in the foundation of a personal relationship with Christ, the roots are short an will shrivel up at the first sign of trouble. I beleive many trials we have faced could have been easier to travel through together had our focus been on Him before eachother.
Being overly sensitive has also been a road block in our marriage. I am very emotionally driven (well, duh! I’m a woman!) and my DH is very cut and dry. I have made mountains out of mole hills and wasted precious time with him mulling over stupid things that hurt my feelings…that should have never hurt me to begin with. Men are wired differently and I think sometimes we forget that and expet them to react in a way that only exists in fairytales and Lifetime movies!! As we have grown together and in Christ, I have noticed an ability to “let things slide” and not take things so personally. A year ago if my DH was in a bad mood and snapped, I’d get upset and it’d turn into a spat. Now, not so much! Boys PMS too!! 🙂
I know that we will continue to rid ourselves of roadblocks in our marriage as we continue to grow together, and I think that if it weren’t for that growing process, we’d not be able to appreciate eachother as much. I’ve always said it’s my husband’s flaws that make me love him the most, because it’s alway easy to love someone at their best; it’s when we love them at their worst that love can take root and flourish.
So with you, sister. We’re not even married yet (T-131 days!!!), and I have already seen my relationship with God flounder… fade into low priority. And after having gotten engaged, I seem to have gone into a different level of emotional…. SO much more touchy now. Certainly doesn’t help that I’ve started taking birth control… :S But I know that these two things are going to be essential areas that we both need to work on before the wedding. I MUST make God time, and also try to “let things slide”, or at least communicate when I’m hurt, and he’s gotta tap into his more sensitive side, and be that soft-spoken encouraging presence when I’m especially self-conscious. We are strange and wondrous creatures, we females!
I defiantly understand about balancing your husband and God constantly checking yourself to make sure God’s first. I have only been married 3 weeks and so far the thing I need to work on is worrying about what other people think. One of the reasons I married my husband is because I can truly be myself. I find myself fighting myself concerning how we do things. Meaning if we make a decision I’m fine with it until I start to think of what others would say. I haven’t talked extensively about this with him but I realize this will effect the both of us so I am trying to get it under control now.
My husband and I have been married almost 22 years. I am blessed by him. What we have been working on is de cluttering the busy ness of our lives. Our eldest is getting married soon, and moving 650 miles away, and we have realized that our family time has taken a hit as our children are now very busy, and the normal activities of 4 children are time consuming. Lots of ‘good’ things, but not always ‘best’ things. For me, being better at saying ‘no’, ‘not now’, and ‘later’. I am working on being purposeful with my time, and not waiting for things to happen, but making ‘best’ things happen.