Welcome 2011

We are so excited to be beginning our fourth year, here on CN!  We have read all of your comments for suggestions, and although we cannot do everything everyone wanted, we hope that the changes we have made are viewed as positive, encouraging, and helpful.

We have increased the number of recent posts on the left of our blog to reflect the last 15 articles published.  That will give you a history of almost the last month’s worth of posts.  We have also increased the number of recent comments on the right side of our blog to fifteen as well.  That will show you where most of the conversations are taking place at that time.

We will be keeping our Tuesday Polls and Friday Sentence Starters. We love how these two features encourage interaction on your part!  It’s nice to see everyone’s different perspectives, and sometimes these things are just plain fun to participate in 🙂

Wednesdays will still be our open days.  We use Wednesdays from time to time to make announcements or let you know about something special that has come up.  Thursdays will be a day for regular blog posts from us. Sometimes these will be topics of our own choosing and other times they may come in the form of a Q&A because of an email from one of you. We might even occasionally take Thursdays as an opportunity to direct you to previously published articles where we have new insights or there has seemed to be an influx of participation in the comment section.

That leads us to Mondays…and our newest feature that we hope many of you will help us with (and a couple of you requested).  We will be starting our own book study group! We will announce ahead of time which book we will be reading and discussing, and then we’ll give you a couple of weeks to get your hands on a copy of it!  Once the book study gets underway, you’ll be asked to read a chapter or two each week, and then come back to us on Mondays for discussion on those chapters!  We three will take turns picking books, and Cumingirl is going to be starting us off this year with a study on the book:  Sacred Sex by Tim Alan Gardner.   We’ll start off the study with a discussion of the Introduction and Chapter 1 on Monday, January 31st.  That gives you four weeks to get yourself a copy of the book and read the first chapter!

Book Studies are only successful if people participate, so go ahead… let your hair down and join us on Mondays to voice your thoughts on what we are reading!  We are hoping for lively and intriguing discussions.  You ladies are already so uplifting and encouraging with one another on the Prayer Request page and on other articles, so we are hoping for some nice participation here too!  Of course the discussion can and will continue throughout the rest of the week as well, but the following Monday we’ll be adding chapter 2 to it!

If you have any follow-up questions you can ask in the comment box here, and we’ll try to answer or clarify things for you.  We’re excited about this New Year and we hope that you are too!

Merry Christmas and Happy Anniversary

Today marks the beginning of our Christmas break, but it’s also the day we celebrate our three year CN blog anniversary. We are amazed and humbled by how many people read our blog everyday. We appreciate this platform that God has given us to encourage women in their marriages and, specifically, in their god-given sexuality. It’s so fun for us to see the community of women here encouraging one another. For so many of you we hardly have to even read your comments before approving them because we know you always have godly input to add to the discussions. So today as we celebrate this anniversary milestone we thank you for all your support and involvement.

We also want to wish you the merriest of Christmases and pray that you encounter the love of God in a new way this year as you celebrate the birth of our Savior. May your times with your loved ones give you joy and peace. And for those in difficult circumstances either financially or relationally, we pray that God would provide for you in surprising ways.

Merry Christmas and all the best for you and yours in 2011!

Our plans for December…

We wanted to keep you abreast of what will be happening with the blog as we reach the close of the 2010 calendar year.

The last two weeks of December (Dec 20-31), we will be taking a vacation from the blog.    It is a very special time for us and our families, besides the fact that it is a really BUSY time for us and our families.   During this time, we will be in discussion and prayer over what God would have us do with our ministry in the new year.  We are receptive to ideas for the new year.   If there are any topics that you would be interested in reading about, feel free to list them below in the comment section.    If you agree with a topic that is already listed, be sure that you comment on the comment, not add a new one.  This will make it easier for us to see which ideas have the most interest.    The blog articles will continue on Monday, January 3, 2011.

We want to wish all of our readers a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.  We have been truly blessed by God in this ministry and we are grateful to our readership who has come back again and again to read our articles and to contribute to discussions. May God bless you abundantly during the holiday season.  Never forget your gift of Salvation born unto us this holiday season.


Cumingirl, Spicynutmeg and Cinnamonsticks

Summertime at Christian Nymphos

Hello ladies!  Just a quick note letting you all know of some summer changes that will be going on here on CN.

School is out and for many of us that can mean that we are now home with the kids all summer.  If you are like us then you are trying to find day trips and activities that can help with summer boredom!  We also seem to have extra birthday parties and family events during the summer, as well as vacations.  With all of this going on, we have decided to scale back a little for the months of July & August.  We will be going to a 3day/week format as follows:

Monday- Monday’s Mission

Wednesday- Poll

Friday- Sentence Starters

Our new feature “Sentence Starters” will debut on Friday, July 2nd (next Friday) and we are hoping you will like it!  Like our polls, it will invite you to participate and interact with each other and us.  We will put up a sentence and you will be asked to either fill in the blank or finish the sentence in the comment section.  Some will be light hearted and others more thought provoking, but our goal is to get you thinking!

Once September begins, we will bring back our regular articles and Q&A’s, so please feel free to continue to email us with any questions or suggestions for topics that you’d like to see us write about.  Thank you so much for your support and dedication to our blog, and we wish you all a very happy and blessed summer!

Women, We Have Heard You – Part Two

Two weeks ago we published this article and asked our female readers for feedback on whether or not they would like to continue to see comments from men on the CN blog. We are thankful that by and large most people were very respectful of other’s opinions and for all the points that were made. We privately discussed the ideas you presented and have prayerfully considered all the opinions expressed.

There seemed to be a lot of concern regarding the simple fact that men are reading a website that has a focused ministry towards women so please understand that our new policy on comments from men is not going to change the fact that a large percentage of men are reading our blog. We think our blog helps most men in healthy marriages to have a better understanding of their wives so we bless that they are reading here. The insight they will gain is going to end up being a blessing to their wives. For those men who are reading here with a covetous heart that they do not have a wife who desires sex, we can not manage their sin for them, but we will restrict their ability to voice their grief here and direct them to appropriate avenues.

There was also some discussion around whether or not the opinion of another man is at all helpful for ladies to understand their own husband. Some were adamant that they only want the opinion of their husband.  Others who are in conflict with their husband or who simply value the opinions of many like hearing the perspective of another man.  While our blog has always been focused on ministering to women, we have never banned comments from men for this reason.

We thought the suggestion of having a separate area for men’s comments was a good one. We discussed this option and realized that since the format of our website is a WordPress blog, it would be complicated, take too much extra time and add confusion.

The most helpful comment that was made regarding the negative consequences of a complete ban of men’s comments was this one:

Even if the men can’t comment, you bet they’re still reading the things you put down. And the very dishonest ones can easily pretend they are women if they want to. So what will we accomplish? We will exclude the honest men who have meaningful additions to the conversation, and the perverts will still get in.

On the other side, one woman made this comment, which struck the heart of the issue for us:

Thanks ladies….This makes me feel a little safer and more free to participate. I, for one, have not participated recently, due to so many men commenting…It was just over a line for me. If I wanted that kind of communication, I know there are other resources – just look at your blogroll – for that. I appreciate the time, effort, thought and prayer you ladies put into this site!!!

After considering all of the points, we have made a decision. We couldn’t possibly have pleased everyone who expressed their opinion so we didn’t even try. We considered all that the women shared in light of our heart for this ministry and came up with this policy that we have peace about:

  • Comments from men will now be moderated on a case-by-case basis.
  • Most comments from men will be deleted, particularly if they are graphic in nature, argumentative, negative or disruptive to our mission.
  • If a man’s comment contains information that is presented in a positive and supportive way and that is a truly unique perspective we might approve it.

Here are some examples of comments from men that will no longer be published:  “I really like this position of the week and will ask my wife to try it soon!”  “Thanks for this review.  My wife and I have been wondering about this book.”  “I really like it when my wife dresses sexy for me.  It heightens our date night!” Each of these comments is rather tame and nice, but do not share a unique perspective that is absolutely helpful to our women readers.  In simpler terms, we will no longer allow our blog to become cluttered with mundane comments from men. We decided to make this decision retroactive, meaning that we have spent hours pouring over all comments made from men since the beginning of our blog.  Those comments that do not fit with our new guidelines have been deleted, so most men will find their comments have been greatly reduced.

We ask that you respect our decision and if you no longer wish to participate because of our policy on comments from men, then we bless you to continue on your journey from here. If for some reason you need to contact us regarding this decision you can do so through our Got Questions? page.

Women, We Have Heard You

An increasing number of women are telling us that the comments from the men are really interrupting their sense of community with the other women at our blog. We know that we can’t stop anyone from reading our public blog and if the men can take the ideas we have posted here and use them for the benefit of their own marriage then we bless that, but we are going to temporarily stop approving comments from the men and we want to hear from the ladies as to whether or not you would like it to continue. It has been the opinion of the CN writers that the comments from the men can be helpful, but seeing as we are here as a ministry to the ladies, we want to take this action in order to serve the women we are primarily focused on ministering to.

So for the next two weeks no comments will be approved from men. At that point, once we have heard from enough of you as to whether or not this action is beneficial to what you are looking for from our blog, then we will make a decision as to whether or not we will allow comments at all from men and perhaps introduce more stringent requirements for which comments we approve from men if the ladies give us feedback that they want a bit of the male perspective on the blog.

So ladies, please post your opinion in the comment section below. Thank you!

*CN News*

Back in November we were approached by Eryn-Faye Frans, and asked to write a guest article for her blog.  (For those of you unfamiliar with her click on her name.)  She enthusiastically works to help married couples with “Commitment, Communication, and Consummation!”  She has a lot on her plate right now with her website, blog, and new book coming out, so she decided to ask a few people if they’d be willing to write guest articles for her.  We feel so honored that she thought of us!  She asked for something written on the subject of Anal Sex, so Cumingirl went to work in December to put something together for her.  On this past Monday she announced to her readers that she would be featuring a couple guest writers each month.  Click here to see where she introduced us! So bookmark her site not only for her wealth of information on marital intimacy, but also so you can check out Cumingirl’s article on Tuesday, January 12th!

And now on to another subject… There seems to be some confusion lately as to comments left on our blog and the moderation of them.  We have moderation cut on.  That means that comments you leave will NOT be visible to our readers until we physically get online ourselves and approve them. However, when you leave a comment, it appears that it is immediately published, and then 15 minutes later disappears.  We assume that WordPress has it set up that way just so that you can see what your comment will look like when it’s published.  You’ll be able to see if you made any spelling mistakes or if your comment made sense.  It is only visible by you for that 15 or so minutes, and then it disappears until one of us three has the free time to get online and moderate comments.  Sometimes it happens quickly (if one of us is online at the time you leave your comment) and sometimes it may be hours before one of us is online.  If you leave a comment that isn’t helpful or that contains inappropriate language/content, then we simply delete it, and no one ever sees it.  We wanted to take this opportunity to try and explain this to everyone, and hopefully this has cleared up any misunderstandings out there.

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